Page 36 of The Write Choice

Nora and I had agreed to this. She, like Brandon, thinks a change of pace will be good for us and had got me to begrudgingly admit that I could see how things might be easier here, which had led to me promising her that I’d give our new setup a real shot.

“It’s so quiet here,” I say. “Not just the lack of city noises. There aren’t any people anywhere.”

“You’re not living in the country, Katie. You have neighbors. Mason and Christine will go to school…” she trails off.

“I did meet some women when I registered Mason for school. One was another parent, and the other was the school secretary.”

Nora frowns. “The school secretary does not count as meeting a potential friend.”

“Oh, well, they’re sisters. Remember I told you about our trip out here in the fall, how we met up with some people at the pumpkin patch, and Mason made a friend?”

Nora nods, scribbling something else in her notebook. Thinks the secretary is a friend, probably.

“Well, it was them. Apparently, we live in the same district. They’re related to the people we came out here to see last fall. Sort of. It’s a long story, and we only have half an hour left.” I hear the garage door bang open and shut. “Oh, hang on a sec.” I make sure to push the mute button before shouting for Brandon.

“Yeah?” he yells back.

“I’m on a call with my therapist. The kids are upstairs throwing tablets or something,” I call without leaving my chair.

“I’m on it!” Before I can unmute the call, he pops his head in, waves at Nora, then fully closes the door.

I stare at the door for a second, my face softening. He knew I left that door cracked open so I could hear the kids, and he immediately took the hand-off when he got home, allowing me to have this uninterrupted time. That knot in my chest loosens a little more, and a small smile plays at my lips as I turn around to face Nora again.

“What’s that look?” she asks as soon as I unmute the call.

My eyes widen in surprise. The woman misses nothing. “Um… Brandon just got home.”

Nora looks impossibly amused as she raises an eyebrow and fights against a laugh. “You’ve been seeing me for years, and I’ve never seen you look at your husband like that.”

“Well, he’s been trying to be more present, I guess, and he’s been really good this past week about making sure I have some time for myself and…” I trail off and shrug. I’m stumbling over my words like a schoolgirl with a crush.

“When was the last time you were intimate with him?” Leave it to Nora to not mince words.

My cheeks heat and my eyebrows shoot up my forehead. “Uh…” My eyes dart to the window over my screen to avoid her gaze.

She tries a different tactic. “You said before that it had been a while. Any changes on that front?”

“No.” My voice is firm, but when Nora lets out a low hum, I’m sure she hears the disappointment.

“Why not?” she asks.

I bristle at her straightforward line of questioning. Why not? What does she mean, why not? Because I started avoiding him as some kind of punishment for his brash decisions, and we never got it together to get back in the same room. It’s simple.

“I didn’t want to sleep in the same room as him until we were on the same page.”

Nora regards me for a moment, her mouth scrunched to the side. “What will it take for you to be on the same page again?”

I blink a few times but remain silent. I don’t know what it will take, if I’m being honest. I thought it would take him coming to his senses and keeping us all in New York, but even a few days here has given me the sense that we are on the cusp of something different. Better.

When I don’t say anything, she jumps in. “It appears that Brandon is trying very hard to ensure your happiness,” she starts slowly. “I would never suggest any level of intimacy you’re uncomfortable with, but it seems that recent events have taken a toll on your relationship as much as they’ve taken a toll on you. This studio, coming home and taking care of the kids so you can have this time for therapy, for yourself…” she trails off like she always does when she wants to phrase something just right. “You said earlier it was a bribe, but what if it isn’t? What if Brandon is trying to repair what has been lost between you two? It might be a good idea to let him know how much you appreciate his efforts.”

I lean back in my chair, my brow furrowing as I cross my arms. “Are you suggesting I reward his basic participation in family life with sex?”

“Oh, no.” Nora laughs lightly, but I’m still frowning. “Not at all. I hear how that must have sounded. I do think intimacy is an important part of any healthy relationship, but sex in a marriage should never be in exchange for anything. Intimacy can mean many things, not just sex.” Her eyes bore into me through the screen. “Maybe start by letting him sleep in your bed?”

I laugh harshly, dropping my hands to my lap.

“I admire your commitment to the decisions you’ve made, Katie.” Well, that’s a nice way to say I’m stubborn. “But we’ve talked about expanding your support system before. It would benefit you to start letting people in. This is not New York, and you are not surrounded by”—she consults her notepad—“‘rich assholes,’ I believe were your words. Start by opening the door for your husband. Just a crack. Maybe see if you can make a few friends while you’re there. Try it out. See how it feels. Consider it practice for when you come back here, if you must.”