Page 40 of Landing Love

But what would it be like to be married to Bill? Would her heart ever heal? Would she ever be able to return the affection he clearly had for her? She didn’t want to break his heart, especially not now. He’d been so generous and selfless to marry her, and she wished with all her heart she was ready to give as much as he had given her.

Those thoughts were too painful to examine, though, so she turned her mind to the practical. Where would they live? She’d never seen his apartment, but he’d told her it was even smaller than her little house. How would they fit? Would they find somewhere new? Did he have the money for that? How would he feel about her working? How often would his job keep him away? And then there was the more immediate question of what he would expect on their wedding night.

She felt numb, and she barely tasted the food she ate. Everything familiar was gone. Every vestige of Roger. She didn’t even have a picture of him now. She would have to ask her aunt for the wedding photo she gave her so that she would have at least one to show Junior. She had nothing of her mother’s either. Her piano was gone. Her book of Gilbert and Sullivan.

“Ann?” The voice barely registered. “Ann?” A hand touched her arm.

“Yes?”

“Would you like some cake? It’s strawberry.” Bill. His face was full of kind concern.

“Yes, please,” she said quietly.

He put a plate in front of her with white cake with a delicate pink frosting. There were strawberry slices between the layers. She took a bite and felt a bit of life return.

“Thank you.” She attempted a smile.

He kissed her cheek. “Is there anything you need that you didn’t buy earlier?”

Yes. Everything. “No.”

“After lunch, I’d like to take you to my place. It’s small, but it will have to do for now. We can start shopping for a house as soon as you’re ready. As you know, I already have the money saved.”

“I wish we didn’t have to spend your savings, but I suppose there’s no choice.” Of course, they had to buy a house. The three of them cooped up in a bachelor’s apartment wouldn’t work for long. She and Roger dreamed of buying their own house somewhere quiet after the war. How odd it was to be fulfilling that dream with someone else.

“Oh. We’ll need to stop at the furniture store and buy a crib for Junior.”

At that she smiled a genuine smile. Such an attentive papa already. “Thank you for thinking of that. I hadn’t even thought about furniture. How unlike me! I’m usually relentlessly practical.” She stopped herself before finishing the sentence with “as Roger used to say.”

“My dear,” said Mrs. O’Donnell, “let me take Junior for a few hours while you and Bill are out. You can come back for dinner this evening. I promise to make it special.”

“Thank you, Mrs. O’Donnell. That’s very kind.” It would be nice to have some time alone with Bill to talk things through.

They finished their meal and went to the furniture store to buy a crib. Bill loaded it into the back of his car and drove to her new home.

It turned out he lived above a barbershop, occupying half of the third floor. The entire apartment was one room with a bed at one end and a kitchenette at the other. The bed was just barely large enough for two, unlike the generously sized bed she had shared with Roger. Despite the small space, everything was neat and tidy. It was good to know he wasn’t a slob she would eternally be picking up after. This apartment was very small, though. They would need to move as soon as was convenient. She and Junior were sure to drive Bill crazy in such a compact space.

Bill hauled the crib up the stairs single-handed and asked her where to put it.

“Next to the bed,” she said. “He doesn’t sleep through the night yet, and I’ll need to feed him in the middle of the night. I’m afraid your sleep is about to become a lot less restful.”

He waved it away. “I can catch up on sleep when I’m out of town. Besides, it’s a small price to pay to have you here with me.”

He sat down on the bed beside her. “I promise you this is temporary. I have nine thousand dollars saved up. For that much, we could buy any house in Mineola.”

Nine thousand dollars was a very tidy sum. He must have been thrifty, and he must have a healthy salary. She wished she wasn’t delaying his dream, but it was ever so sweet of him to be so selfless.

He took her hand and kissed it. Then he leaned in and kissed her cheek. She could tell he wanted to kiss her lips and was hesitating. Didn’t he realize they were married now? He could kiss her anytime he wanted. And more. Would he want that now? She had assumed they would wait until tonight.

She leaned her face towards him and brushed his lips with her own. He leaned in for more. His tongue parted her lips and touched her own. He seemed hungry for her but so restrained, so careful. It was different than kissing Roger. Bill was slow and tender where Roger was passionate and demanding. She liked the slower approach. With Bill, she opened like a flower seeking the sun. It had never been like that before.

A little moan escaped her as their kiss continued, and his hands stroked her back, pressing her close. She could feel the magnetic tug of his closeness, the heat that his touch drew forth. After several minutes of this decadent treatment, he pulled back.

“You don’t have to stop.”

“Yes, I do. I promised myself I wouldn’t push you until you were ready.”

I am ready. The thought surprised her, but the wetness and heat between her legs was undeniable. Still, he was right. She wasn’t in the right mindset for it. Even as her body craved his, she appreciated that he didn’t push.