Page 91 of Cava with My Colleague

“I barely mentioned him.”

Sara puts her mimosa down. “Jade.” She gives me a stern look, like we know you and we see you.

I open my mouth. I close it. “That doesn’t mean anything.”

“It means everything,” Tessa says cheerfully. “So when did it happen? Last night? Give us everything.”

So I do. They already know everything professional, so now I tell them about the personal, the things that I’ve been trying to pretend didn’t mean anything. They paint a picture, though—the moments of connection, the way we started to understand each other. And it ends with last night—with Seville—about him showing up at my hotel room door, about the research he did on the train, about waking up tangled together.

“He researched oral sex?” Sara asks. She makes a face. “On the train?”

Then I have to explain just how long it’s been since Carlos has been with anyone, and the situation with his late wife.

“Oh,” Emma says. “That’s sad.”

“It is.” I trace the condensation on my glass. “Carlos isn’t like any guy I’ve ever met.”

“I never thought you’d be with someone who didn’t match your energy,” Sara says. “I mean, in the bedroom, at the very least, but other places too.”

“Well,” I say. “I’ve always said it’s more about enthusiasm and open-mindedness. And Carlos definitely proved that.”

“Very thoroughly, apparently.” Sara smirks.

“I love him for you,” Tessa declares. “Jade, you have to keep him.”

“It’s not that simple.”

“Why not?” Tessa asks.

“Because I’m leaving. I have two weeks left before I have to report back for work in Austin. My assignment here is over.”

“So extend it,” Emma says. “Ask Rebecca for a permanent position.”

“It’s not just about the job. It’s—” I stop, trying to find words for the tangle of feelings in my chest. “I’ve never had a long relationship.”

“Yeah, because you had an amazing opportunity to move to China and Doug refused to go with you,” Tessa points out.

“Exactly,” I say. “And going to China was the best thing I ever did for my career. I don’t regret it one bit.”

“Do you?” Sara asks gently. “Or is that just what you tell yourself?”

I look down at my mimosa. I was angry at Doug for not supporting me, and then angry all over when I came back. He had moved on—engaged and in love, and the only man I’d ever loved had settled down while I’d been off having my own adventure. What would have happened if I hadn’t gone to China?

What would happen if I don’t go back to Austin?

“I don’t know anymore.”

“What does Carlos want?” Tessa asks.

“I don’t know. We said we’d talk after Monaco. Really talk about what’s possible.”

“But what do you want?” Emma presses.

That’s the question, isn’t it? The one I’ve been avoiding since I woke up in his bed.

“I want him,” I admit quietly. “But I’m terrified.”

“Of what?”