Page 39 of Dreams and Reptiles

“Yeah, Grandpa had a couple horses, but mostly they had goats. The best part about this side is that there are stall doors to the outside as well, so I’m able to build indoor and outdoor spaces for the creatures over here. I’ve only built two so far, but I have room to expand.”

He led me over to the first one and made a grand gesture with a straight face.

“May I introduce you to Elizabeth Taylor?”

I immediately got what he meant about their personalities. This iguana was absolutely fabulous.

“Look at her, so regal. Aren’t you beautiful?”

The female iguana sat atop a branch with her head lifted proudly toward the heat lamp, looking just like the queen of her domain.

“Richard Burton is around here somewhere.”

“Burton? Any reason you picked that husband? Wasn’t she married, like, eight times?”

He snorted. “I surely wasn’t going to name him Larry Fortensky. Nah, I picked Burton because just like their namesakes, these two had a tiff at one point, and I had to separate them, but then they kept looking for each other, so I put them back together, and it was like whatever their problem was, the absence made their hearts grow fonder.”

“That’s sweet. You really are a romantic, Kendall. Don’t ever change.”

He shook his head and opened a box next to the iguana habitat. He pulled out a handful of somethings that were moving and opened the cage door.

“Let’s see if I can get—ah, there he is. They can’t resist these worms.”

Yep, I was going to have to get used to bugs. The old rhyme about the old lady who swallowed a bunch of random things that “wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her” got stuck in my head. If I was going to be with this man, I would have to develop a stronger constitution at my advanced age.

But the iguanas were so cool. I’d jokingly called the tortoises dinosaurs, but these two looked even more prehistoric. It was fascinating to me how like works of art they were, how they moved, so sinewy and menacing, just like the predators they descended from, but as Kendall plucked the male off the floor of the enclosure, the creature was so gentle. He carefully crawled up Kendall’s arm and roosted on his shoulder, staring at Kendall like the sun rose and set in his eyes.

I feel you, dude.

“There are several different types of iguanas. These two are from Hispaniola. I’m getting two more—they’re Cuban Rock iguanas—and I might be taking on a tegu, but I’m a little concerned because he was a house pet, and I’m not able to provide that kind of environment.”

“A house pet? What is a tegu?”

He pulled out his phone and showed me pictures of him holding a giant lizard.

“They’re huge! Like it just walks around? How do people have that in their house?”

He snorted. “I’m from Florida, Francis. People keep all kinds of interesting things in their houses.”

I rolled my eyes. “Okay, but⁠—”

“You can build a large cage, or I’ve seen people let them roam free. Folks who love them say that they’re like dogs, and they’re usually not aggressive unless you corner one in the wild. I don’t see the attraction of keeping them in the house, but the one I’ve been asked to take on is used to being treated like a house pet, so I might not be the best person.”

“It would certainly be loved, though.” Romantic? Cares for animals? Will run into a fire for you? Check. Check. Check. He really did check all the boxes, even before I’d met his crew. Now there was no question.

“Can I?” I reached out to touch Richard Burton. I needed to know I could do it.

“Yeah, sure. He’s really friendly.”

“I’ve never seen one of these in person, but I watched a documentary once about marine iguanas in the Galapagos? They’re amazing, how they had to learn to swim so they could eat the specific kind of sea plant to survive.” I’d watched so many hours of television while sitting on the couch at Max’s. That particular program, however, was one of the first things that started pulling me out of my moping. If these amazing creatures could manage to survive under extraordinary circumstances, I could too.

The iguana’s skin was such an interesting texture. I’d thought it would feel scaly, or slimy, but it was dry and bumpy. It wasn’t creepy at all. I could see the appeal of these creatures the more time I spent here. It helped that Kendall’s enthusiasm was contagious.

“This pair was taken from an exotic-animal hoarder who had so many animals he shouldn’t have had. The local shelter was looking for folks who could take on the ones their staff wasn’t equipped to handle. I took them, as well as a pair of chameleons, who we’ll see next.”

“Why did you become a firefighter rather than working directly with the animals?”

“I don’t know. I guess after doing fire suppression in the Navy, it just made sense to go that route. I had a family to provide for, and I knew I could get hired. I didn’t go to college, so becoming a vet would have required a lot of schooling that I didn’t have the time and resources for. I could just imagine coming home and telling my ex-wife, ‘Hey, I’m going reserves, but I’m going to go to college and further add to your stress, ’kay?’ She would have had my man parts for sure.”