Page 52 of Beautiful Disaster

“You may not. And you will not speak again unless spoken to.”

Keeping my head down, I scoot closer to him.

Mason clasps the chain and locks it into place. “Hand me your wrists,” he orders.

I hold them out, and he locks a cuff on one hand, then he does the same with the other. They feel weird since I never wear jewelry, but I’ll get used to it.

Since I have a question, I raise my hand.

“Yes, my pet.”

“What do I tell my family when they ask? They will definitely ask.”

“You can tell them the truth, if you wish, but being discreet in public is the point.”

I nod and set my hands down, waiting for my next orders. It’s weird. I’ve spent my entire life fighting everything, even my own friendships. Here I am practically giving my soul to Mason. It feels… good. I love anything that clears my head, and he’s amazing at doing that.

Mason takes my hands, palms up, and kisses each wrist. “They’re perfect on you.” He inspects my fingers. I want to pull away and hide them. They’re not as nice as his, which are smooth and manicured, and I hate the tattoos. “Workers’ hands. I love workers’ hands. Hands that don’t shy away from manual labor.”

I want to tell him I hate them, that I don’t understand why he sees them the way he does.

“What do these tattoos mean?”

“They mean nothing. A hooker friend did them. He used a real needle. It seemed like a good idea at the time.”

“A form of resistance and rebellion?”

“Yeah, I guess.” That’s exactly what they became to me later on. “Casper, one of the other trafficked boys I grew up with, did them.” I pull my hands away and rub the male and female symbols on my two middle fingers, looking at the peace sign and other weird designs Casper made up. There’s also a skull. “Tito lost his shit when he saw them, beat me for it. So, yeah, they became symbols of defiance. Now, they’re a reminder of all I fucking suffered.”

“You could remove them.”

“I could.” I can definitely afford to. “For some reason, I keep them. I hate that they remind me of my past, but I can’t let go of them either.”

Mason grabs a hand again and kisses my knuckles. “I get that.” He inspects my nails, then looks at me. “But you must stop biting your nails.”

Fuck, that’s going to be hard. I’ve been doing it since I was little. Most of us boys did. Aleks, too. All I can do is nod. “I’ll try, but I can’t guarantee I’ll stop.”

“Just do your best.”

He drops my hands and tugs on the chain around my neck, pulling me closer. “I’m ready to see how good that mouth of yours is, Precious.”

And one thing I’m amazing at is giving head. It’s been a long-ass time, though I doubt I’ve forgotten how.

Chapter 15

Mason

I have to grab Jinx’s wrists again when he reaches for my pants to undo them. “I didn’t say you could do that.”

“But you said…”

“Silence.” His eyes are an ocean of blue when he looks up at me, filled with worry. “I did not say you could look at me.” He instantly drops his head, and I let go of his wrists. They gently fall into his lap. “You’re still learning, my pet, but if there are any more infractions, I’m going to have to punish you.”

Jinx stays still and silent. Perfect. It must be difficult for someone so talkative and snarky to say nothing.

I gauge him carefully, watching for any sign of psychological or emotional discomfort. When he gave me the green light earlier, not understanding that it was a yellow, concerns me. I worry that he’s not entirely clear about consent. It would make sense, since there were no boundaries around his body when he was a kid. But he was also with women. They would be clearer, so hopefully he learned. It’s my job to ensure his physical, mental, and emotional safety.

I stand in front of him and push the chair back. “You can touch me now. Undo my jeans, pull them down with my underwear just over my ass, and take out my cock. You will please me to the best of your ability. I want to feel you gag around me. I want to see watery eyes. When I’m fully satisfied after coming, you will clean me up with a hot washcloth that’s sitting on the kitchen counter next to the sink. There will be no speaking except to tell me which color, but you will keep your eyes on me as you suck me off. Nod if you understand.”