Page 145 of Sands of Atonement

He placed his arms around my shoulders and pulled me in, and I let him. I hated to admit it, but there was always something in Salazar that made me feel safe to confide in him my entire life, that made me excited to learn something from him.

It was my blood. It was he—he was my father.

My heart cracked in grief for the man I had come to know as my father. Besides his resounding encouragement, there was no pull between him and me, not like Salazar.

I allowed his comfort, my head lying on the soft part of his shoulder.

“Come with me, Eshe,” he muttered against my ear.

Realization settled in that I had a half sister. Little Tarrie. She had the same blood as me. She was as much related to me as Yonam and Kavid.

“Tarrie,” my voice almost cracked. “She’s my sister.” I had always treated her as such, but now this made it that much clearer to me.

He nodded softly, still holding me.

“Salazar, I need to do something before I go home.”

His arms tightened around me. “Revenge is not the answer, Eshe.”

My blood then began to numb as I opened my eyes and stared far into the dunes. “My family deserves justice.”

“I know they do. Do you think his death is the answer?”

“I do,” I said without hesitation, and I couldn’t believe the words that came out of my mouth. I almost didn’t recognize myself.

“Killing a Qahl is no small matter,” Salazar remarked, stepping back.

“I trained for it—with Garamgai,” I said meekly.

A twitch in the corner of Salazar’s lips told me he was proud. “But still, Eshe. I didn’t come searching for you just to allow you to endanger yourself with revenge against Kavid.”

I took a step back and spread my arms out. “Then what is the answer? Where is justice? My family didn’t deserve what happened because of who I am, because you’re my real father.” My voice cracked, but I quickly gained control over my feelings.

I imagined ice-cold silver poison flooding my veins, cooling every emotion that tempted me to deter myself from anything but perfect revenge.

“Let me take care of this. I have some friends in Zyriah. Perhaps I can persuade them to take up the challenge. The people haven’t been too happy with Kavid, regardless. But I do not want you near him, do you hear me?”

I nodded—the feeling of seeing my old country sparked something inside my bones.

“I’ll stay away from him,” I lied.

“Good.” Salazar gave me a tight smile before pulling me into his arms. I melted in them like I have my entire life.

Chapter 36

Eshe

It’d been days since I last saw Ezra.

The further we rode, the heavier the pressure in my chest felt. Not to mention the sickening feeling of my brother murdering my family made this journey increasingly unsettling. My body ached to do something—but I couldn’t.

Not yet.

Once I arrived in Crahst, my plan was to get Norrah into safety while I… I found Kavid. And…

And then I would…

I shook my head and straightened my spine, feeling Norrah’s body pressed against me. To my right, Salazar rode nearby. We had been connecting in the early, quiet mornings when everyone was asleep. He explained more about his relationship with my mother in secrecy. He expressed that he wanted to keep my mother’s reputation pure. He must have really loved her.