Page 130 of Sands of Atonement

Chapter 32

Eshe

After spending the afternoon with everyone, enjoying cups of kava and music from Casimir and Norrah’s sound bowl, we had dinner in the main hall. I was distracted, and it was becoming increasingly difficult to enjoy anything after what Ezra admitted to me. Anyone would be. Now, I had a bigger issue. Figuring out if my brother killed my family or not, after finding out that said brother did indeed try to kill me.

What a fucking mess.

I was a mess.

Despite Ezra’s better judgement, he continued following me closely all afternoon.

Dinner was quick, and Yven brought everyone outside for a fire and wine above the cliffside, towering over the desert sands. It didn’t go over my head when Ezra refused the wine.

Norrah leaned into me on the lying palm trunk. “Are you ever going to tell me what’s going on between the two of you?”

“I’m not marrying Casimir, if that’s what you’re wondering.”

Casimir leaned toward me from my other side with a twinkle in his eye. “Good, because I don’t want to marry you either. You’re insane!”

My jaw dropped, edged with a smile. “I’m insane?!” I blurted out. “I think this is our first argument, and we’re not even married.”

Casimir dropped his voice. “You and Ezra fight non-stop. What does that say about the two of you?”

Norrah chortled on my other side, and my face flushed with heat.

“It says we hate each other, Cas. What else would it be?” The moment the words spilled from my mouth, I instantly regretted it.

“It can mean a lot of things, love.” Casimir winked at me.

I looked across the fire, hoping to God that Ezra wasn’t overhearing this conversation, but his eyes were locked on mine with tightness in his jaw.

“Go away, Cas. You’re nothing but the source of meaningless drama.” I gently pushed him off the bark of the palm, and he laughed and joined Yven and Ezra on the other side.

“Not to add to the meaningless drama, but I was serious about the question I asked… about you and Ezra.” Her eyes peered into mine.

“Absolutely nothing at all, why?”

“It doesn’t look like nothing. It looks like everything. He looks at you like you’re… everything. I would like someone to look at me one day. The way he does with you—it’s different.”

I wanted to roll my eyes at her, but I refrained. “It’s the kava talking, Norrah,” I deadpanned.

“Well, then he’s been drunk on kava ever since I’ve seen you two together. Because it’s not just tonight.”

My heart began to thump a little harder at what she was implying. “You have some keen observation skills I don’t know about, Norrah?”

Norrah dropped her gaze. “I… I’ve just learned how to survive in my own way. I’m not a warrior like you, Eshe.” She began to play with the bark between us. “But I’ve learned to anticipate people’s reactions before they even know.”

The crackle of fire faded the voices on the other side as Norrah continued to talk. “I’ve also been on edge, which just makes me more… observant. It’s like an obsession now. I’m constantly looking for Gabriel.”

“He won’t find you,” I said.

“I know, but… can I do this forever?”

“You won’t have to.”

“I have a feeling he won’t stop. In my bones, I can feel it. I feel like he’s right behind me. I find myself constantly looking over my shoulders.”

“If that’s what you need to do, then it’s worth it. You don’t want to be married to a man who frightens you. You want someone who makes you feel safe. Makes you feel like you belong together. Every moment that passes, you just can’t wait to be near him, not away from him.”