Page 113 of Sands of Atonement

“I’m so sorry. This isn’t fair to you. You should be allowed to choose what kind of life you want for yourself. I understand why you left the way you did.”

“I ran away the day I was to be married to him.”

My lips twitched, and Norrah caught it and slapped my arm.

I burst out laughing. “You are unreal. I bet Gabriel had never experienced such embarrassment before. That man will carry that humiliation for the rest of his life.”

We both laughed at that, and it felt good to hear it from her.

“Definitely never experienced anything like it,” Norrah agreed. “The first time I met him, I could tell he’d never had a day where he had to explain himself to anyone. He’s the General of Brestan… He answers only to the Qahl.”

“I doubt he’d ever been rejected by a woman before,” I wondered out loud. The respect I had for her grew.

“Me too.” She shook her head as if still amazed that she had escaped.

She then offered me the pipe. “No, thanks,” I said.

They had all been smoking, but something kept me from trying it. His words still rang in my head.

“I’m so appreciative of our friendship, Norrah. Truly, I’ve never had a friend quite like you,” I said earnestly.

Norrah smiled. “Aww, I appreciate you more than you’ll ever know…” She gave me a warm hug before leaning back. “You know, you remind me of a friend I had back in the school I lived in.”

“Really? What’s she like?”

“She’s got a rough sense of humor, dry, like you, though she’s quieter than you are.” She looked off into the distance as if recalling her memories, smiling. “She has eyes like you. She’s adventurous, and she’s just really wonderful.”

“I’m so glad you knew a friend like her.”

“Me too… I hope she’s okay. She didn’t have it easy at the school we lived at.”

We continued talking about her school until she got up to refill her beverage.

“Where is Ezra?” I asked no one in particular, just waiting for the perfect opportunity to ask without it being obvious he had been on my mind the moment I entered the room.

Casimir caught my eye. “In the other room. He doesn’t stick around for these kinds of activities.”

“Why?” My brows furrowed, wanting to understand Ezra more than ever.

“He doesn’t like to lose control, especially over himself.” Casimir shrugged. “Hasn’t since we were twenty-three.”

Twenty-three. That was two years after my family died. That must have been when he became Atrovian. I tilted my head, wondering how much Casimir knew of Ezra’s identity.

“What happened then?” I knew I shouldn’t be prying, but I couldn’t help it. What made Ezra want to change so badly that he became involved with the Atrove?

“He wasn’t himself for two years…” Casimir became quiet and didn’t meet my eyes. “At first, Ezra was Ezra. Then, for two years, he was a dark mess, uncontrollable. We had fun, but deep down I knew he wasn’t… doing the best. Then all of a sudden something snapped in him and he went in the complete opposite direction.

“If you ask me, I think neither version of him is Ezra. Or maybe all these sides are truly him?” Casimir laughed and shook his head. He was high. This was perfect—he was giving me so much detail on Ezra’s life.

No shame, I continued, “What do you think happened that made him lose control?”

Casimir’s throat moved as he swallowed, and then he shrugged.

I realized now that I was standing with my hands on my hips, towering over his seated position. I probably looked like I was interrogating him. Which was true. I was taking advantage of him, unapologetically.

“You all have fun.” I turned on my heel and waved. “I’m beat.”

Norrah returned a wave.