Page 11 of Knot Her Beta

The admission settles between us with all the dangerous familiarity of muscle memory. Nights on my couch with his feet tangled with mine. Early mornings at the docks with coffee steaming between our hands. Tangled sheets and the mix of pheromones.

And then Carson happened.

The broken promises.

The feeling of not mattering.

The realization that Leif was hurting, and he didn’t trust us enough to ask for help. Logic tells me it was trauma, years of conditioning that showed him no one would listen, but even knowing the reason for the secrets doesn’t stop how they made me feel small and unworthy.

My grip tightens around my bottle. “Leif⁠—”

“I know.” He remains calm, but tension pulls at his edges now. “I know I hurt you.”

The room keeps moving around us. Quinn shrieks with laughter from the kitchen. Holden shouts about people staying out of the desserts. Blake immediately shouts back.

But all of it fades beside the Omega standing in front of me.

Leif takes a slow breath. “I should’ve told you before I made the decision to join the Wright Pack.”

My heart stutters. “It’s not as if I had a real pack to offer as an alternative.”

Not anymore. Not since Auren stole mine.

“That doesn’t excuse anything. I knew your intentions, but I kept telling myself I needed to handle Carson before it became your problem.” His jaw flexes once. “And by the time I realized how bad things were, I’d already broken things between us.”

I stare at him, my heart hurting. Leif has never lied to me about who he is. Protective. Steady. Willing to shoulder more than he should if it means keeping the people he loves safe.

But loving someone isn’t the same thing as trusting them.

And trust is harder to rebuild once it cracks.

“But joining the Wright Pack doesn’t mean…” His periwinkle eyes plead with me. “It’s protection, Em. I don’t want to keep being alone out here, and I love Quinn. I needed the stability after what happened with Carson.”

“The Wrights are good people,” I admit softly. “And there’s strength in numbers. But I can’t say it didn’t sting, even after everything.”

“I know.” His head bows, his mauve hair falling over his forehead. “But they’re packmates, not bondmates. I still want that. With you.”

The hurt rises again, but underneath it comes a warm, stubborn pulse behind my ribs, because even now, standing this close to him comes too easily. My body remembers the broad warmth of his body pressed to mine. The way he touched me.

As if I belonged there.

Leif’s gaze drops to my mouth before lifting again. “I still want you. Belonging to the Wright Pack doesn’t change how I feel.”

Heat flashes through me so suddenly that it leaves me flushed with embarrassment.

The distance between us suddenly becomes unbearable in a way that has nothing to do with anger.

“I don’t know what we’re doing,” I whisper.

“Neither do I.” A fragile flicker of hope lights beneath his composure, careful enough that it almost hurts to witness it. “But I know I’m not done fighting to be with you.”

I swallow hard, uncertainty warring with hope of my own. Because that’s the problem, isn’t it?

I’m not done, either.

“Dinner’s ready!” Blake calls as he comes out of the kitchen carrying a platter.

Quinn trots at his side, a basket of bread held above her head. “Take your seats, everyone!”