Page 59 of Elizabeth Bennet Says Yes to Mr. Darcy

“Yes.”

“No.”

I looked up.

“Never?”

“I've known women before you, but no lasting relationships and none I could call a mistress. Since I've known you, no one.”

An absurd jealousy shot through me despite his answer.

“These women…”

“Didn't matter to me the way you do.”

“That's not exactly what I was going to ask.”

“Yet it's what you wanted to know.”

I shot him an irritated look.

“You're getting too good at reading me.”

“I'm practicing.”

He took my hand.

“And you?” he asked. “What do you fear?”

I could joke, deflect, pretend I feared nothing. I thought of his promise never to make my safety the price of my obedience.

“Not knowing what I should do. Being hurt. Disappointing you because you think I'm bolder than I might actually be.”

His face grew serious.

“You'll have nothing to prove. We'll go as slowly as you wish. If you want me to stop, you'll say so, and I will stop.”

“Even after the marriage?”

“Especially after the marriage. Consent given before an altar does not replace the consent you will give me in our chamber.”

I felt my eyes fill with tears and grew annoyed with myself.

“You have a very improper way of making a woman emotional.”

He brushed away a tear with his thumb.

“I can speak of something else.”

“No.”

I placed my hand on his chest. His heart was beating fast beneath my glove.

“And you? What do you fear?”

“Hurting you. Losing control. Seeing in your eyes that you regret choosing me.”

“That's a great many fears for a man who shows so few.”