Page 74 of Holding On

“Gone? Like gone … where?” My voice waivers with the last word like a child’s.

“The cleaning crew showed up to her house this morning and rang the doorbell—I guess Rick didn’t allow them to have keys to the house. No one answered, but they looked inside and … they saw Mom in the living room. The police found her body this morning, slumped over on her living room couch. She died, Tinsley. They think she … died last night, but we’ll know more after they investigate.”

“What? She was just … dead and alone?” I can’t wrap my head around this news, but the idea of her body sitting in their living room alone—dead—overnight is jarring to me.

“I know.”

I quickly shake my head, like I need to wake up from this twilight zone or will be able to find logic somehow if I clear the cobwebs of this information that is not making any sense to me. “What about Rick?”

Wells would’ve led with that news if we were lucky enough for that asshole to be dead.

“Good question—and one of my first ones too, after … well, what happened, of course. The local authorities haven’t been able to locate him and neighbors haven’t seen him in a few days. Somewhere, I was listed as next of kin for notifications. Apparently, the last confirmed sighting of Rick at their house was by a neighbor sometime late last week, with a possible sighting the next evening, but the next-door neighbor wasn’t positive it was Rick or maybe just Rick’s car.”

“What happened? Like, how did she … you know…” I can’t say the words.

She’s dead.

My mother is dead?

This can’t be real.

“I don’t know that answer yet. There weren’t any physical signs of trauma or any blood that they could see, but she had plenty of bottles of booze around. So, honestly, Tinsley, who knows? We are both more than aware of how much she drank on a typical day. It’s probably impressive she lived as long as she did with how shitty of a job she did taking care of herself.”

“But where’s Rick? Why wasn’t he there? What if she needed help and he could’ve done something? Why isn’t he there now? Why were the cops calling you instead of that asshole?”

“I don’t know. The cops want to talk to him to see if he knew anything, because as of now, her death is technically an unattended death, but so far, they haven’t been able to reach him or even find him. Because of her drinking history, there’s a good chance it was some kind of overdose or alcohol related issue that caused her death, but an autopsy will tell them more.”

What the hell?

“An autopsy, Wells? Is that really necessary to cut her open like that?” I might be sick.

“Yeah, I think so. They have to investigate, and to be honest, Tinsley, I need answers too. I don’t want to wonder what could have caused it, especially when I still have more questions than answers about Dad’s death. I want to know exactly what caused this instead of just assuming it was her drinking, even though it probably was. I can make peace with that, but I need to know what happened to our mother. Don’t you?”

“I don’t … I don’t know what I need right now, Wells.”

“I’m sorry. I know this is all complicated with how … well, let’s be frank, how shitty of a mother Bridget was after our father passed, but at the end of the day, she was still our mother. You don’t remember the days before, but she wasn’t always like that. And if there is even a remote chance that something is suspicious with her death, then I want to know—and I want justice if anyone else had anything to do with her death. She may have been a shit mom, but she was still our mom.”

“Yeah, I know, I’m just…”

“Shocked.”

I nod, and then realize he can’t see me. I clear my throat, trying to find my voice. “Yeah, that’s it. I need to call Jack.”

“I already called him. He was finished with his meeting in Nashville and immediately started heading your way. I told him you would call him after I talked to you.” I nod again to the empty room.

“Wells, if this ends up being just because of her drinking or whatever, and nothing was shady about it, I’m telling you right now, I will not go to her funeral with him there. I can’t do it.” I close my eyes as tears threaten to fall—but not for my mother—for the idea of facing Rick at her funeral.

My stomach churns and I’m glad I got this call before I had food in my stomach that I could have thrown up.

“I know, Tinsley. I would never put you in that situation. If that’s how this all shakes out, we’ll either do something just us, or … just not. Rick can do whatever the hell he wants. I don’t consider him part of our family, so I don’t consider him part of anything we decide to do or not do as we process this all.”

Oh, thank God. I exhale and my shoulders lower. I hadn’t realized they were up almost by my jaw.

“Thank you, Wells.”

“I’ve got you. I’ll be on a flight back to the states probably later today. I don’t know when quite yet, but I’ll send you a text when I do. We will get answers and go from there. Alright?”

I nod again. “Okay. I love you.”