Page 35 of Enter if you Dare: Part Two

“Who was in there?”

“Steedy,” Rowan answers. “They caught him, too, but the things I had to listen to. And don’t look at the bathtub.” He swallows hard. “A few nights ago, I heard the bells, and he dragged Steedy out of here. I know that I’m next.”

I press the back of my wrist to my mouth and breathe through it as my brother watches me. He has spent his whole life reading me, and his face changes when he sees me processing everything.

“You have to get me out.” His hands pass through the bars, catching mine again. “Tonight, Valli. Please, I can’t be next. He told me I was next. Said he was waiting for you to be strong enough to help him do it. Do you understand what I’m telling you? They want you to kill me. I told you they were up to something, and you didn’t listen. They don’t love you, Valli, they’re killers. What happens if you do something they don’t like?”

“Stop.”

“Mom would be sick if she knew.”

“Stop!” My tone surprises Rowan, and he realizes my demand is serious.

“Did anyone follow you?” he asks quickly. “Does anyone know you’re here?”

And there he is, the brother I despise, always trying to manipulate me. “I need a second to think.”

“There is no time to think.”

“I have to think.”

I back up toward the stairs as he reaches through the bars. Rowan’s face morphs into the man I know right in front of me. I can’t tell anymore which parts are true and what he is putting on. There is no way my men would do this without a good reason. I haven’t known them all that long, but they have done nothing but be good to me.

“I’ll come back, I promise.”

“VALLI!” he screams, then his voice drops. “If you leave me down here, you’re one of them.”

I run back up the stairs and into the kitchen, where I gasp for air, grasping the edge of the counter. Right in front of me there is a bowl with a set of two keys. I stare at it for a long time, not knowing what to do. I don’t want my brother to die, but what happens if I let him out? Will we repeat the same cycle that we have been stuck in since our parents died? What happens when his actions affect Leni? She is in a good place right now and happier than she has ever been. Her life has to mean something—Rowan and I are lost causes, but she has a chance to do better, be more successful.

No, I need time to think, and they haven’t killed him yet. If what he says about the Jester is true, then Rowan is mine to kill, so he won’t die anytime soon. I need time to think and come up with a plan.

So I take a deep breath and lock the house behind me, then walk back the same way I came. The whole way back my mind spins with questions surrounding Cave and the Jester. I thought they barely knew each other. How much do Noa and Cipher know? How many of them have been lying to me?

I return to the office and sign the key back in, then go about the rest of my day. When I get back to the shed, dinner is ready. Noa has really embodied the claimed househusband name he has given himself. Cipher is telling him all about the machine he is rebuilding, and Noa keeps saying the wrong name for the parts, which gives Cipher a twitchy eye. Cave puts the biggest piece of chicken on my plate and watches me while I eat it.

I have spent weeks falling in love with these men, and it’s hard to believe that they are all lying to me.

Noa switches the conversation to Christmas, as he is already planning everything. He is helping Rue with the menu, and Leni has volunteered to help—apparently she and Noa talk at least once a day.

Cave has been assigned tree duty for the shed, and Noa wants it to be magical. Cipher talks about the lights he plans to rig up around the island in an interactive display.

“You’re quiet,” Noa says, knocking his knee into mine. “Nixie ran you into the ground today?”

“Long day, vendor stuff,” I hear myself say. It’s my first lie to them, and I hate it, but I need time to think.

Cave’s head comes up, and he looks at me across the table. “Tired,” I tell him, and I make myself smile as I reach across the table to squeeze his hand.

Once we finish eating, Cave picks me up and takes me to bed. The other two eventually join us, and I pretend to fall asleep, but I don’t. Instead, I lie there for hours, staring at the ceiling.

I’m sandwiched between them all, Cave’s heavy arm over me, Cipher at my back, and Noa’s foot hooked over mine. Held on every side, feeling the safest I ever have as I run through everything from that night onward. Rowan pointed a gun at me, and he was going to kill me. He did not bat an eyelid over it, and instead he shot Cipher. My brother was going to sell me out to Steedy to save his own ass. I struggle with that part a lot, that he would have sold his own sister to pay his debt. He hit me, plus add in the years of not being grateful that I saved his ass over and over again by working myself to the bone. I know exactly who my brother is—my internal conflict is not confused about that part.

But on the other hand, he is locked in a cell, and was made to listen to whatever happened to Steedy, which I do not want to think about. Weeks have passed and not one person has said anything to me. The lies and secrets make me feel like we are back to square one. I lived that life before coming here, and I never want to live it again. I thought all of this was over.

What Rowan has done in the past has no bearing on what they are doing to him now. One doesn’t cancel the other; both sides are wrong. Rowan’s harsh words ring through my head: “If you leave me down here, you’re one of them.”

Cave

What remains after love lets go?