Page 60 of Hope and Hot Chocolate on Mistletoe Lane

It was a crap cliché but it made me realise in those moments that I loved Holly Wynter. Maybe I always had done. But I knew it now. I could define it, admit it to myself, and I could use it to be the best man possible so that when she was ready to love me back, I would deserve her finally after all these years.

Snapping myself out of my funk, I got ready to man the café van at Mistletoe Lane. Yesterday, I’d asked Dad to do it for one day instead of me, saying I had to go to the supplier. It could have waited but I didn’t want to go to the farm and see it without Holly there. And my dad had confirmed she wasn’t there when I’d casually asked him about it later.

Today, I knew I needed to get over myself and get back to the job I was supposed to be doing until Christmas.

I knew I would miss Holly being there by my side like crazy, though.

* * *

When I drove into Birch Tree Farm, there was a group of people outside the polytunnels even though it wasn’t open to the public yet. I drew up and parked the van in the usual spot then I climbed out and wandered over to see what was going on.

It was freezing today. The light snowflakes that had been floating around town since yesterday morning were now falling heavier and thicker, dusting the landscape and landing on top of the synthetic snow on the polytunnels so you didn’t know where one ended and the other began. I hoped the snow wouldn’t put people off coming to the winter wonderland as it was mostly indoors, but they would need to come outside to the café van and the ice rink. I walked through the snowflakes to the start of Mistletoe Lane.

Willow was gesturing wildly as she spoke to Dylan, his dad and brother; the ice rink guys were there too, listening to her. I looked beyond them to the polytunnels and realised the snow on the top wasn’t the only thing different to when I’d last been here.

The lights weren’t on anywhere.

‘Paul!’ Willow cried when she saw me. ‘Our main generator has failed. The battery is completely dead. Maybe it’s this snow, I don’t know. I guess it’s getting old now but we couldn’t afford to replace it plus do all this,’ she said, gesturing to the winter wonderland. ‘The nearest place that has one is not only two hours away but I called them and they have twice the amount of snow that we do so they’re closing for the rest of the day.’

‘Even if they were open, we wouldn’t have time to get the battery and replace it before opening time,’ Dylan said, rubbing a hand across his face. ‘This is the problem with not having enough money in our emergency budget.’

‘We had no way of knowing it would fail before Christmas,’ Willow said. She placed a hand on her stomach and sighed. ‘I was worried something bad would happen when Holly left.’ She threw me a glare, letting me know she was blaming me for what was happening right now. If she thought I should have convinced Holly to stay longer then she needed to join the club. I blamed myself for not being enough to keep her here too.

‘I don’t think Holly could have solved this,’ Dylan said softly.

‘Can’t you cancel opening? It’s not the end of the world surely,’ Dylan’s brother, Nate said, earning a glare from Willow.

‘We can’t. Not to mention the money we will lose, think about how we’ll disappoint people,’ Willow said. ‘There has to be another option.’

‘This snow will need clearing,’ Dylan’s father said then, looking around.

‘I know that,’ Willow said crossly, evidently fed up with everyone. I understood that feeling well. ‘But when has a bit of snow stopped anyone in Birchbrook?’

‘Will people really want to come out in this weather?’ Nate continued, not getting the message that she’d had enough.

‘I have an idea,’ I said, saving him from her wrath. They all turned to me, eyes full with hope and relief. ‘Let me make a call, okay?’

‘Thanks, Paul. That’s what we need today – problem solvers,’ Willow said, glaring at everyone else. Then she sighed. ‘Sorry, guys, I think it’s the hormones making me irritable. But this could be a real disaster; I’m really worried. And I do wish Holly was still here.’

‘I know, try not to worry. We’ll sort it out somehow.’ Dylan wrapped an arm around her as I walked away with my phone, longing to know what Holly had said to Willow about why she had to leave earlier than planned. Had they talked about me? I tried to focus on the problem in hand. I had to help Holly’s winter wonderland stay open. She needed her business to get a great name from Mistletoe Lane and that wouldn’t happen if people couldn’t even get here.

Elliot picked up immediately. ‘Hey, man.’

‘Mate, I have a huge favour to ask…’

39

HOLLY

‘That’s how you left things with Paul?’ Georgia cried across the table from me in Starbucks.

It felt so strange to be back in our usual coffee shop like the past three weeks or so hadn’t happened. I nodded. I had told her the story of me and Paul. She had been giddy about me spending the night at his, but when I told her I’d walked away from him after he’d offered me a place in his life, she looked almost as gutted as he had done.

‘God, Georgia, his face when I left his apartment – he was so disappointed in me. And even though I wanted to just jump into his arms and stay there, I couldn’t let him rescue me. I need to rescue myself.’

‘I’m all for female empowerment, you know that, but I do have a small question… how are you going to do that?’

Paul had put his heart on the line but I hadn’t been able to do the same because I knew deep down, I wasn’t ready. I wanted to though, and that was a big step forward. But I needed to work out what I wanted from life. I admitted to him that I wasn’t sure I could be happy and that was because somehow over the years, I’d convinced myself I didn’t deserve to be. ‘I need to face my past instead of running away from it all. I almost did it again but what Paul said was right. I need to try and fix things, otherwise it will all just follow me wherever I end up going. He thinks I’ve run again but even though I had to leave Birchbrook, I really am determined this isn’t me doing what I always do.’