Page 89 of Derivation

“So, because you took one risk when you were just out of college and it hasn’t worked out how you hoped, you can’t take another one now? How did you start other relationships, then?”

“It’s not the same thing.”

“How is it not?”

“They didn’t feel like risks. This one does,” Sarai said. “It feels like a pretty big one, too.”

“I think that means something. Don’t you?”

“It means it’s scary.”

“For me, too, but I’m still willing to go for it.”

“Me too.”

“I don’t want to convince you to date me, Sarai. I feel like I’m back in Amsterdam, and–” She stopped. “Wait. Did you just say you, too?”

“Yes, I did.” Sarai chuckled. “I’ve been afraid of a lot of things in my life, and the truth is that, tonight, sitting out here, I realized that while I don’t have all the things I thought I’d have by now, I think I might have something better.”

“What?”

“I have that family you pointed out.” Sarai nodded toward the house. “And our company might not be that successful yet, but there’s the possibility of that on the horizon now. Besides, working with my best friends for all these years, while definitely frustrating at times, is still better than working anywhere else.”

“Tell me about it. I had to go to an office party tonight for someone’s birthday. When they started singing and got to the name part, I didn’t know what name to say, so I just went silent and pretended to smile.”

Sarai smiled at her and said, “Will you go out with me?”

“Finally,” she replied.

Then, Gabi kicked them off again, and they sat in the swing as it swayed, but instead of staring at the tree, Sarai was looking over at her.

CHAPTER 24

Sarai looked at herself in the mirror and wasn’t sure of her choice. She’d opted for a dress because it was a first date, but Gabi hadn’t ever seen her in a dress before. Usually, she just wore casual clothes around the house and maybe a nicer sweater paired with some decent jeans when she went out to the bar.

“Just go out there and pick her up, even though you live in the same damn house. It’s not weird. Don’t make it weird,” she said to herself. “You chose this dress for a reason. Don’t doubt yourself now.”

Having her friends tell her that they’d noticed her insecurities over the years had been a pretty big wake-up call for Sarai, but hearing that Gabi had been willing to move out of the house she’d only just moved into in order to have a chance with her had been the thing to push Sarai over the edge. She had worked up the courage to ask Gabi out, and now that it was finally happening, as Gabi had put it, Sarai was both excited and terrified.

Of course, she’d happened to ask Gabi out on the least sexy day of the week, Monday, and since Tuesday and Wednesday weren’t exactly nights known to produce hot dates, they had pushed their first date out a bit. Sarai had also made plans with Arlowe, Enya, and Violet to go for a friend dinner on Wednesday night before she and Gabi had talked on the swing, which meant that her first date with Gabi was four days after they’d agreed to go on one.

And had they not lived together, that wouldn’t have been a big deal. They probably would’ve texted or talked on the phone a bit between the asking part and going on the date, but having four days around the same house, knowing that they were going on their first date, had been a little awkward. They hadn’t told anyone that they were going out, but her friends had to know, given how Sarai and Gabi had been like their old selves around the house, laughing, talking, sharing small touches here and there, and spending time on the swing together as opposed to her being out there by herself. It had been so nice, having someone sit out there with her. Sarai wasn’t sure that any of her friends had ever joined her out there when she’d been in one of her moods. Maybe they had been afraid to or something, but Gabi hadn’t been, and that had made all the difference.

“Whoa!” Arlowe said, looking up at Sarai from her position on the sofa. “What are you all dressed up for?”

“Nothing,” she lied. “Just going out.”

“You look nice,” Enya told her with a smile. “Is that dress new?”

“No, I’ve had it for a while. I just haven’t worn it before.”

“Hey,” Violet said, walking in from the kitchen. “Damn, Sarai. You look hot.”

“Uh… Thanks?”

“Who are you calling hot now?” Stella asked, following Violet out with a big bowl of popcorn.

“Sarai. Look.”