Page 124 of End Game

Curling up on his bed, I spread his blanket over me and take a deep breath. It smells like him, like home.

I don’t know what happens, because the next thing I know, the bed is moving. I lift my head to find Barrett laying beside me. I don’t know what time it is. He’s wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt, and I know that’s not what he wore to dinner with his parents.

“Go back to sleep, baby,” he says. “We can talk later.”

“We should… we should talk now.” I yawn. I can hardly keep my eyes open.

Barrett shifts on the bed and slings his arm around my waist. His feet tangle with mine.

“Later,” he says. He presses a kiss to the top of my head. “You’re here. We can figure the rest out later.”

When I wake up some time later, Barrett is nowhere to be found. The bed is warm beside me. I can hear the shower running in the attached bathroom, so I know he hasn’t gone too far. Rolling over, I stretch my arms above my head. It’s six o’clock in the morning, way too early to be awake.

The shower turns off, and I can hear the curtain being pulled aside. The walls are really, really thin. I know we tried to be quiet that night we had sex, but now I’m wondering if everyone already knew. Could they hear us?

I’m not embarrassed or ashamed at the idea of his friends knowing we had sex. There’s nothing shameful or embarrassing about having sex with Barrett. What I’m not so crazy about is knowing that everyone knows all about my business. I don’t even know what is going on with Barrett and me; for everyone else to be privy to the sensitive details…

The bathroom door opens and Barrett steps out, running a towel over his head. He’s wearing jeans and a fresh t-shirt, the long sleeves pushed up his strong forearms.

“You’re awake.” He blinks. “Did I wake you up?”

Struggling to sit up, I pull the blankets up around my waist. “Nope. It was time for me to wake up.”

“Oh.” He moves to his dresser and pulls out a pair of white socks.

“I’ve been thinking a lot about what you said,” I admit.

“Oh?” He looks at me over his shoulder. Whatever he sees on my face, he turns around and perches at the end of the bed.

“You love me. You have feelings for me,” I state.

“Yes,” he says, agreeing readily.

“You want more than friendship.”

“Yeah.”

“So… what does that mean?”

“Well, it could be a lot like our current friendship,” Barrett says slowly. “I could hold your hand.”

“You already do that a lot.”

He blushes. “Yeah, I know.”

“And what else?”

“There could be kissing.”

I swallow. “We’ve had sex, but we haven’t kissed. Didn’t we do this backwards?”

Barrett sighs. “You were hurting. You wanted a distraction. Sex with you, yeah, it was amazing, but I knew it was to get you out of your head. I was just a warm body for you.”

I open my mouth to object. I can’t. He’s right.

“I knew what it was. I went into it willingly,” he tells me. “But kissing you… when I kiss you, I want you to know how I feel about you. That’s why I didn’t even try.”

“But if we were… more than friends?”