Page 67 of If We Were Young

He shrugged, but his lashes dropped.

“Matthew?”

The moment pounded like it flexed around the edges.

“Angela.”

I pressed my hand into my chest.

“Oh.”

Why didn’t she tell me?

“I was very drunk. It was a few months after I’d asked Julie for a separation.” I couldn’t help but sense he held something back, wasn’t telling me everything.

I blinked, stupidly. Why the hell hadn’t she told me this?

“She just said you’d moved back into your mother’s house.”

“Yes.” My voice wobbled though. Oh my god. She knew he wouldn’t be bald and fat. I wrote a note on my mental shit list. “Why did you rent this place?”

He shrugged, but his gaze remained unflinching as he stared at me.

“I should go home.”

He nodded and released his hold on me, and I shivered an icy chill. Bending at the knees, he picked up my coat and then held it out for me to slip on. Once I had my arms in, he buttoned me up like a little dolly.

The kiss seemed far away now.

Apart from in my head where it whirled around free-fall.

“I’ll come up with some better ideas for the rebrand by Monday, I promise.” I scrabbled for something to say.

His frown flickered, becoming scored on his face. And his look said it all; is this all you have?

“I’m sure you will.”

“Don’t worry about walking me home. I’ll be fine.”

I peered through the open windows at the night sky.

“Sure you will, but I’ll walk you anyway.”

I knew there was no point arguing. So we walked along in silence once he’d locked up the front door behind us.

“It’s a nice conversion.” My brain scrambled to make conversation. “I looked into something very similar a few years back, when… well, you know why.”

He nodded. “Why didn’t you? Did you think it would be too hard by yourself?”

“Yes. Maybe. Ma said I’d get lonely.”

“Have you anyway?” I cast him a quick side eye at his question. “Got lonely?”

“Sometimes.”

It only took a few minutes to get to the big semi. The lights were still on. My chest tightened as I stared at the curtains lit around the edges.

There would be questions to answer. Questions I would have to dodge in my desperate need to get up to my room and lie on my bed face first and analyse the kiss. The Kiss.