Page 5 of Tears of Glass

She nods slowly and pulls me into her arms, her lips pressing against my damp cheek. “Then what? Why isn’t he here? He loved you, I could see it from a million miles away.”

My chest, where my new ink is still burning, cracks into a million shards of glass. The glass of my broken heart. “He’s marrying someone else.”

And then I cry like I’ve never cried before.

My eyes are sore and my head is whirling. I’ve drunk a lot. A LOT.

It’s nice. I can’t feel anymore. I like it.

“Have you stopped flooding the place with tears?” Dan plops down next to me on the sofa and puts his arm around my shoulder. I sink into his familiar embrace. It’s warm, sliding over me as comforting as a favourite sweater. I don’t know where Abi, and her husband Adam are. They could still be here. I can’t see three inches further than the end of my nose.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to make a scene.” This is what I think I say.

“So, he’s really marrying someone else?” A gentle pressure pushes against my hair. “What a knob.”

“What a fucking arsehole.” I sink further into Dan’s chest. “And she’s really skinny.” My fingers pluck at his white shirt, playing with the buttons. He’s a good friend, Dan. He’s always here when I need him. He’s never let me down. “And she was wearing fucking red. I mean who wears red to a summer ball? It’s not bloody Christmas.” I burp, but it’s a bit sicky and I clamp my lips shut. Dan wouldn’t like sick down his funeral suit.

Al.

A burning anger mingles with the whisky sloshing like a stagnant river in my tummy.

Dan’s fingers trail along my back. “Faith, I don’t think the dress was the problem. It was more the fact she stole your man.”

I glare, like I can still see her sashaying her skinny hips past me when she took him away and led him onto the stage.

My lashes flutter shut and I can still see him standing there waving at everyone, celebrating his engagement like he was a goddamn prince.

And I can still remember the fact he didn’t look once at me.

“How’s your tattoo?”

“Mm. Fine.” I can’t be bothered to move to have a look at it. All pain is good right now. “Where was JoAnne today? That’s her name, right, JoAnne? Or is it AnnieJo? I can’t remember. Sorry.”

Dan sighs, his fingers still trailing up and down. “I haven’t spoken to her since Dad died.”

“Why?”

My ears rush with blood, the alcohol storming through my system drowns out the silence around us.

“I don’t know.” He shifts under me, rocking me a little. Doesn’t he know I’m one movement away from hurling down his suit? “It’s complicated, I guess.”

I roll over, my head still in his lap. I’m glad the whisky is filling ninety-nine per cent of my faculties. At least I can’t notice how big the house feels without Al in it.

“Everything’s so complicated, right?” I stare up at him. “When did it all get so shit? You’re an orphan.”

Dan smiles and I reach up and cup my hand around his cheek, grazing my thumb across the fair stubble on his cheek.

Elijah has dark stubble; his hair dark and his eyes of the brightest blue.

Fuck, Faith. Stop thinking about him.

Dan’s handsome, so large. His muscles are immense and unyielding as a rock. “When did you get this big?”

I know I’m not talking sense. But that’s okay, sense sucks.

“Faith, I’ve always been like this. It’s you who ran away and left us all behind.”

I did run away. Running is what I do. It’s what I’m known for. Even Elijah knew that and I only knew him for four weeks.