Page 96 of Tears of Ink

“This is just for the summer, that’s what we said.” God, those words hurt, but I can’t think of anything more than that. It was my compromise. I’m not the girl who thinks of happily ever after. Eli isn’t my prince. He isn’t going to swoop in and make the past disappear. He’s not going to erase all the many reasons for my ink.

He pulls away slightly. “Yes. That’s what we said.”

I crumple a little. It’s what I want him to say, but my chest squeezes in such a way that for a moment I forget how to breathe. I don’t even know what it means when your chest pushes the air out of your lungs like that. All I know is I want to kiss him, to cling to him, until the summer is over and then I’ll go back to how I was before.

“Come, let’s go.” I pull on the door handle and step out of the car, not giving him a chance to do that gentlemanly thing he does with the door.

He eyes the street as we stand side by side. “So, this is where you grew up?”

I shake my head and point in the direction of a road largely out of sight, a three-minute walk away. “I used to live there. But I spent most my time here with Dan.”

The door opens then as if on cue and Dan leans against the door frame, his eyes watching me, analysing Eli and the way his hand is holding mine.

Dan’s face is a picture I never want to see again. His eyes blurred, red-rimmed. In his hand is an empty glass. “Dan?” My voice cracks and I fly up the path into his chest and wrap my arms tight around him as though I want to keep us both afloat. I cry into his neck and droplets of tears splatter his T-shirt. “You okay?”

“Yes, yes.” He wipes at his nose with the back of his hand and straightens up to meet Eli.

“Hi, I’m sorry to meet you under these circumstances.” Eli steps up and holds up his hand. Dan shifts from foot to foot but then shakes his hand.

“Eli, Dan. Dan, Eli.” I wave my hand between them and step into the front room. “Fuck, Dan, this place is revolting.”

He glares at me. “Because you’re the queen of clean.” He picks up a pizza box and places it on the table. “I’ve been busy.”

There’s movement from the kitchen. Please, God, don’t let it be him; I wouldn’t able to take it. A girl with dark hair comes out, wringing her hands on a tea towel. “Who the hell are you?” I ask.

It’s not a surprise that her gaze narrows into slits and she looks at me with as much warmth as a polar ice cap. I didn’t mean to be rude. My expectations were focused on the worst. “JoAnne.” She drops the tea towel onto the edge of the sofa. I can see she’s not one to tidy either. “Who the hell are you?”

I’m taken aback. Dan and I have always known the ins and outs of each other’s lives. We’ve known all there is to know: every kiss, every fuck, every row. Tighter than family, it’s always been us, with Abi as our third wheel until she got all grown up and married. Yet here the two of us stand, both of us flanked by total strangers. “I’m Faith.” I step up and hold out my hand. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude. I thought someone else might be here.”

Dan comes close to my side and squeezes my shoulder. JoAnne’s gaze zooms to his hand on my skin. “I got rid of the crew. Everyone is taking it in turns to keep him entertained.”

“Is he still awake?”

Whether I can walk into that hospice I don’t know.

“Not really, Faith.” Dan’s gaze focuses on Eli. ‘So how do you two know each other?”

“Elijah owns the house I’m working at, he drove me here.”

I cringe under Eli’s hot gaze. What was I supposed to say? He’s my boss, but we are embroiled in some forbidden and pointless affair that’s going nowhere.

“Thanks.” Dan nods at Eli, but thankfully only I spot the faint curve of Eli’s lips.

“Always a willing chauffeur to a woman in need.”

I glare at him but then turn to JoAnne. “So, you guys are a thing?”

This is so awkward. When did this happen? That life would carry on and things would change without me knowing.

I know when it happened. It was when I ran away.

“Yes.” She’s not a fan of me; it’s not hard to read that headline. What on earth has Dan told her?

Oh well, I haven’t got time for this shit now. “Can I go and see Al? Oh and thank you but I don’t need a room now. Eli and I are going to stay in a hotel along the sea front.” Eli has taken care of everything, which is a good thing because my brain can’t handle more than three minutes of the future at a time right now.

Dan nods, “Want me to take you, or is your chauffeur driving you about all day?”

Eli steps up and places a hand on my shoulder. “I’ve got it, thanks.”