Page 21 of Splintered Desire

Black spots dot my eyes as I hear his footsteps retreat, followed by the scrape of his chair on the floor in the dining room.

I double over, bracing my hands on my knees as I heave in lungfuls of air even as panic threatens to choke me.

I’m so fucked.

With the new location, The Pit is pushing for more fights, and while I don’t have to take part, I want to.

I could always use the money, and now more than ever I can use the outlet.

Every weekend for the next three weeks, I fight, and there's some big fight set up at the end that is all hush-hush, a celebration for the new Pit. I hadn’t cared what it was before, but now, knowing who’s in charge, I’ve been trying to listen in on their conversations a little more, see if I can hear anything about it.

Of course, I’ve heard nothing so far, though. They don’t seem to talk about the fights much outside of actually being there, and that’s when I want to be as far from them as possible.

Well, that’s not true.

I always want to stay away from them, but at The Pit, it's dangerous to be around them. One wrong move, and they'll know who I am—what then?

Thankfully, this week has been rather boring. Diane and Dad have spent a lot of time at the house, wanting to eat dinners together and enjoy what's left of the warm weather before fall hits in a few weeks. BBQs, pizza, time in the pool, and even a movie on the projector out in the yard.

It’s all been great, if I’m being honest, and if I had normal brothers, I might even enjoy this new ‘family,’ but that’s not how life goes, at least not for me.

By the time Diane and Dad turn in each night, it’s late enough to say, “I’m doing the same.” I really do have homework to get done and a book I’d love to finish.

Not to mention training, since I can only do so much in the gym.

The week has been easier than I thought possible while living with the three of them, and I almost don’t hate it…almost.

That is, until Thursday night, when we’re all sitting around the table eating tacos that apparently they made.

Had I known that prior to eating them, I would have refused. It wasn’t until I took a bite and my eyes nearly rolled into the back of my head as the flavor exploded on my tongue that my dad cared to fill me in.

“The boys make a mean taco, don’t they, Munchkin?” I nearly choke on the once-delicious bite as it turns sour, and I have to gulp down water.

“Heavens, dear, don’t call her that when she’s eating; you know how she hates it.” Diane scolds my father, and while I do hate it, that has nothing to do with my near-death experience.

I can’t exactly tell them why I’m choking, though, so I let it go.

The smug look on Kol’s face tells me he doesn’t need an explanation; he knows.

We eat, and the guys and Dad make small talk. Diane asks me if I have my eye on any lucky guy, and she seems genuinely sad when I quickly tell her no. I don’t really date; the one man I ever thought I might be with disappeared, so I just take that as a sign from the universe.

It’s almost normal—until dinner's wrapping up and Jace opens his big mouth.

“Don’t worry about it. Me and Zee can clean up, Ma,” he tells Diane when she starts to collect plates.

She beams at his use of a nickname for me, clearly taking it for something it’s not, but I don’t have the heart to correct it. Judging by the smirk on his face, he knew exactly what he was doing, too.

“Such good kids.” I hear her tell Dad as they head up for bed, leaving me with the three of them.

Fucking hell.

I swallow down the slight panic and push to stand, collecting plates the way Diane just had without looking at any of them directly.

They might be intimidating, but I don’t need to cower at their feet if I can help it. I can clean up and get to bed without incident; I just need to move and not give them a reason to say anything.

To my shock, they remain mostly quiet. I hear Jace snicker when I move around him to collect his plate, but he doesn’t say anything to me, and I do my best to ignore him and pretend like I don’t feel their eyes following my every move.

I make it to the kitchen, setting the plates down in the sink before I breathe a sigh of relief.