Page 38 of The Long Way Found

"I don't know… Top/bottom, gay/bi… all these labels you've gotta pick."

"Have you? Picked?"

"I've always been bi, I suppose. But it's not a big struggle. I like who I like—and it hasn't been many of either variety, really. You… a few guys in school out of town, no one else in the service… then Anna…"

"Is that a long way of telling me you never bottom?"

"I mean, I have. But it's not... I haven't done it often."

"Because you don't like it?"

"No, it's OK." Jack stared at the ceiling. "It's hard for me. It feels… like I'm opening myself up."

They both laughed.

"Well, yeah—it is opening yourself up, of course," Jack said. "But I mean more than just physically. Losing control like that, giving something I haven’t given many times."

Luke propped himself up to look at Jack. "I feel totally in control when I'm giving myself like that. It's really a masculine thing to do. Seriously!"

They both looked at each other with raised eyebrows.

"And it doesn't have to be about losing control," Luke said. "It can be about giving it to someone you trust."

Jack met his eyes. "That's the hard part."

Luke held his gaze for a long moment, then smiled and lay back down. "Well, if you ever want to try, I'm a pretty trustworthy guy."

"I know," Jack said quietly.

Luke's phone buzzed on the nightstand, breaking the moment.

He reached for it, read the screen, and smiled. "Mara wants to know if we want to come over for pizza and Uno."

"Tonight?"

"Yeah, six o'clock." Luke set the phone down. "We don't have to. I know you've probably had enough social time for one day."

Jack surprised himself. "Let's go."

Luke propped himself up on one elbow. "Yeah?"

"Yeah. Why not?"

Luke's smile was slow and warm. "Okay, but fair warning. Marco cheats at Uno, and Nita will make you read to her."

"I can handle it."

"And Mara will probably corner you in the kitchen and give you some version of the 'protective best friend' speech."

Jack pulled Luke down for a kiss and reassurance. "I said I can handle it."

They showered—separately this time, for efficiency—and dressed. Jack in jeans and a sweater, Luke in his usual fitted Henley and boots.

As they walked to the Jeep, Luke playfully bumped into Jack's shoulder. "You sure about this? Game night with two kids can be... a lot."

"I'm sure."

And he was. Mostly.