Page 44 of Blue Gold

Only then did I have the courage to look up and meet his eyes, and once I saw the absolute acceptance in them, I felt relief. However, relief would be too little to describe this incredible sense of freedom that came with a simple admission of the truth. But this feeling was soon to pass as I remembered my situation.

“No one can know,” I pleaded while shaking my head. “Elliot⁠—”

“Shhh.” Cupping my face in his palms, he slowly made me stand up with him. “I won’t tell anyone, I promise,” he whispered, voice so tender I could hardly cope with it.

My heart raced at his closeness, and before I knew it, I closed my eyes and leaned into his touch.

“I’m sorry.” I covered his hand with mine, my heart torn between what I wanted and what I could never have.

“For what? You did nothing wrong, Daniel.”

“For dragging you into this… It’s wrong.”

It was weird how, despite never saying things specifically, they were still so clear—my feelings for him, that was.

“There are many things that feel wrong, even though they aren’t… especially love. But it doesn’t mean they’re wrong, just complicated,” he said in the softest voice, which felt even more endearing because of the French. Us speaking a foreign language provided me with another layer of security. A sort of guarantee that no one but us could understand this conversation. What was more, it made me believe we were in a whole other world, and I cherished this feeling from the bottom of my heart. But mostly, Elliot had just proved to me that we didn’t only share a language, but a whole lot more.

“And you claim you aren’t intelligent?” I asked, my voice so weak it was hard to hear even in a quiet room.

Elliot chuckled, sounding so full of life, before he moved a bit closer. I worried he was about to kiss me when⁠—

“Back in France, I was involved with a man, and it ended badly. So bad that I needed a fresh start in a place no one could even understand what I was saying… until I met you.” His brilliant eyes softened at that last word. “But thinking back on what happened there brings me great sorrow, so I try not to. If that’s okay with you?”

Even though I had about a million questions to ask him, I didn’t and instead nodded.

“Of course it is. Your past is yours to keep, Elliot.”

“Thank you.” He planted a kiss on my cheek, making my insides melt. He lingered for a bit before moving his lips to my ear. “Now you know my secret, too.”

In his own unique way, Elliot had just formed an alliance between us.

After turning my world upside down, my French prince pulled back and checked out his thumb. “Looks like I’m ready to go back to cooking now,” he said cheerfully, then glanced at me. “Do you want to join me, or…”

“I think I’ve had enough cooking for one day.” I smiled at him.

Thankfully, Elliot didn’t push me further and left the room, leaving me with so many thoughts I feared my head would burst. The most concerning one being⁠—

Have I completely fallen for him?

14

DANIEL

Excitement kicked me out of bed, and I snuck into the bathroom while Claudia was still deep asleep. Going over everything that had happened yesterday, from spending the morning with Elliot at the farmer’s market to the tense conversation we’d had right here, in this bathroom, it was no wonder I could hardly sleep. My heart was eagerly racing in my chest, and my stomach churned with the pulsing need to see him again as soon as possible. Therefore, I skipped shaving and quickly brushed my teeth before I put on my jogging clothes and went outside.

The sun had yet to rise, making it a bit chilly, although it quickly got better as I began running. I wanted to go and see Elliot smoking his cigarette right away, but too nervous to face him so soon, I’d decided to do a few laps before. After all, it was only yesterday that I’d admitted to myself that I was, without a doubt, in love with him. And while it had been a slow descent—a journey I’d dragged out for as long as I could—it was a fall nonetheless, and my heart was now captivated by this French prince.

Around the third lap, my body was all warmed up. I used my shirt to wipe beads of sweat from my brows when I remembered Elliot’s words from yesterday, and then, in an impulse that was unlike me, I took off my shirt and tucked it in the waistband of my shorts.

The kiss of the wind blowing on my chest made me feel exposed, yet I sucked it up and continued running. There was no reason for me to be ashamed of my body, given the work I’d put into staying in shape. Claudia often encouraged me to “show off”—her words, not mine. However, it was only after Elliot mentioned that he would also like to stare at me that I felt the eagerness to get naked.

Spotting the guesthouse from afar, I increased my pace. By now, the first rays of sun were already painting the sky in bright hues of red, and I knew how divine Elliot would look in this lighting. But as I reached my regular spot, I was sad to find out he wasn’t out on his porch. My heart fell as disappointment washed over me. Until now, he’d never skipped his morning cigarette, but the day after he learned I loved watching him, he decided to skip it. Had I mistaken yesterday for something else? Could it be that what I thought was him reciprocating my feelings was nothing but pity? But just as I began sinking into my typical pessimism, the glass sliding doors of his porch opened, and Elliot walked out, a big smile on his young face.

“Bonjour, Daniel,” he greeted me with a wave.

In seconds, my mood changed, and happy he was here, I first looked over my shoulder to check the coast was clear before I ran closer to him. Elliot bent over the porch rail, and for a moment, it felt like we were recreating a scene from Romeo and Juliet. Only the porch he stood on wasn’t at all high, and only a few steps separated it from the ground.

“Good morning,” I finally greeted him back, a bit out of breath, as I watched him tuck a cigarette between his lips.