Page 127 of Blue Gold

“I’m gay,” I said out loud for the very first time. And while it wasn’t the best way to come out, far from it even, there was still a sense of liberation those words carried. But then, I paused and focused back on Claudia, and the great unfairness my truth had caused her.

“And it isn’t some new revelation. I knew about it all along.”

“So why? Why did you marry me?”

“Because—” I took a deep breath. “—after meeting you, I knew that if I had any chance of falling for a woman, it would be you.”

Her brows knitted together, and her shoulders slumped. “And? Did you?”

The hope in her eyes was almost too much to bear, and I wished I could have told her a simple yes to make her feel good. But unfortunately⁠—

“I loved you, Claudia, I still do, but not in the way I should have.”

“You mean, not like you love him.”

My throat tightened with the pain I’d caused us.

“I’m so sorry for hurting you. I never planned to be unfaithful, and I know it’s not an excuse, but when I met him…” I shook my head. “Everything changed.”

She stepped closer. “And if you hadn’t met him, what did you plan to do then, huh? Would you have stayed and led me on for years? What about our daughter, did you ever stop to think about her?”

“All the time.”

Her face twisted with anger.

“That’s bullshit. You say you’re sorry, but you don’t know a shred of how you’ve hurt me and her.” Tears now followed her words. “I’m not a fool. I know why you felt the need to live a lie. But to drag me into this? To bring a child into this messed-up life?”

“I love Maya with all my heart,” I hastily declared, my voice shaking at her insinuation that I didn’t. “And I never wanted to hurt her on purpose.”

“But you did,” Claudia snarled, eyes furious. “And you know what the sad thing is? It’s that if you were only honest with me since the beginning, you would have had a real friend in this fucked-up world you live in, but no. You chose to be a coward. And a liar. And a cheater.” She jabbed her finger in my chest with each word. “The worst part? Is that I loved you. I really did. I loved you with every part of myself, but you didn’t even have the shred of dignity to respect that love.”

She took a step back and wiped away her tears. “We have a lot more to discuss, but not now. Not here. I deserve more than—” She waved around us. “—whatever this is.”

I nodded. “Okay.”

Her mouth tightened into a thin line before she took a deep breath.

“I’ll probably forgive you with time. Not because you deserve it, but because our daughter does. But him?” Her lips curled with anger as she pointed at the room Elliot was in. “Never.”

She turned to walk away but stopped and glanced at me one more time. “And to answer your question, I didn’t tell your father. If only you’d really tried to get to know me in the decade we spent together, you’d know I’d never betray you that way.”

Finishing what she had to say, Claudia didn’t wait for my response and left. While I still wasn’t sure how I felt about what had just happened, now wasn’t the time to process it.

With her gone, I was finally able to focus on the person I came here for. Quickly fixing my suit and tie, I let out some air and moved toward the room. My brows pulled close as I noticed the door was ajar, but shrugging it off, I knocked before fully opening it and allowing myself in. There, on the recovery couch, was my Elliot, a bandage wrapped around his ankle with an ice pack. But what captured my full and undivided attention was his bloodshot eyes, red from crying.

The door hadn’t even closed behind me, and he burst into tears that ached in my soul. Without stopping to think, I closed the distance between us and collected him into my arms, hugging him so tight I left no room for air.

Practically melting into my embrace, he choked on a sob, his hands clenching onto my suit almost desperately as he continued to cry uncontrollably.

“It’s okay, my love,” I whispered before kissing the top of his head. “Everything is okay.”

With his face shoved into my chest, he shook his head, and his cry tugged at my heartstrings.

“We all fall at times.” I held him tighter. “The important part is that you got back up.”

“No.” His voice quivered under his pain. “I-it would be better if I’d… stayed down.”

I pulled back and cupped his face in my hands. “How could you say something like that?”