Page 81 of Dissolving Prejudice

My heart rate increased, and my palms turned sweaty. And while I didn’t want to lie to his face, I had no other choice. “I am telling you the truth. I went for a walk around the village because I needed space.”

“Space?” He sounded hurt. “What the hell are you talking about? You had the whole day yesterday for yourself.” He stepped closer to me while I stood still.

“I was with Miles in the spa yesterday, and you know it.”

“Give me a fucking break, Shay-Lee.” He tore his eyes away from me and sighed. “I know you only spent the morning with him, and yet you returned to the room much later.”

How the fuck did he know that? After I got off Camilo’s stupid boat, I came back to our room, which was empty. Jordan was still hiking with the guys and nowhere to be seen.

“How did you know that?” I hissed, eyes narrowed.

With annoyance, he glanced back at me. “Know what?”

“How did you know when I returned to the room?”

Biting the inside of his jaw, he shook his head while placing his hands on his waist. “Are you actually trying to gaslight me right now?”

My eyes widened with shock. “What?”

“You’re un-fucking-believable. You know that, right?” He raised his hands in mock surrender.

Now pissed off, I stepped toward him. “What on earth are you talking about?”

“I’m talking about you trying to change the subject and blame me for something instead of facing what you did, Shay-Lee,” he yelled, veins straining against his neck. “It’s exactly what you did in high school. Shit—” His voice broke, and he turned around so I wouldn’t face him.

I was glad he did that because looking at all this pain taking over his features was like placing a mirror in my face. His hurt proved to me once more what a piece of shit I actually was.

“I didn’t mean to do it, Jordan. I’m so sorry…” Why was I even apologizing? Was it for lying about today? Or was it because of last night? Maybe I was apologizing for ever accepting his love to begin with? But whatever it was, it truly didn’t matter because what was the point of saying sorry when the word meant so little coming out of someone like me. Truthfully, I was such a low-life that my remorse, same as my love, had absolutely no value.

Washed with guilt and shame, I began scratching the silver ring he’d given me with my thumb, almost like I was trying to rip it off my flesh.

“We haven’t had sex,” he suddenly said, cutting into my thoughts.

Confused, I looked at him. “What?”

Stepping toward me, he put one hand on the knot of his towel, almost like he was ready to take it off. “Since we’ve gotten here, we haven’t fucked. Not even once.”

My body went rigid at the thought of sleeping with him, and I swallowed hard. “You already know that I’m not always in the mood.” To put it simply.

“I bet you’d be in the mood if it was with him.” He hissed that last word like a curse.

Now, almost standing in my face, he looked down at me. He wasn’t much taller than I was, and yet, just now, he made me feel so fucking small.

I placed my hand on his chest. “You have no right to speak to me like that.”

Jordan grabbed my wrist and brought it between us so we’d both see the ring. “I have every right.”

Biting the inside of my cheek, I shook my head. “Whatever.” I shrugged him off. “I’m tired and not in the mood for sex—”

“But I am.”

“What?” I frowned at him.

His face turned even more serious. “I’m telling you that I’m in the mood to fuck you.” Still holding my wrist, he used his free hand to grab my waist and jolted me closer.

“No!” I shouted, furious, and pushed back because what the fuck? The next thing I knew, he grabbed me harder, his hand clenching me tight enough for it to hurt.

“Jordan, you’re hurting me—”