Page 161 of Forgotten Prejudice

Once I was able to stand, I got out of the stall, freshened up, and quickly left the building. Walking fast, I was trying to think what I’d tell Ashton once I saw him. How would I be able to keep this away from him when I could hardly breathe? But what choice did I have? He would run away the second he learned why I called him my good boy—

A loud honk pierced into my thoughts right before someone shouted, “Watch out,” and I was yanked back. My ass slammed onto the hard pavement, and I groaned in pain before realizing what had happened. People were already gathering around me, asking me if I was okay. Blinking my eyes several times, I saw a man getting out of his car, his hands in his hair.

“He came out from nowhere—” the driver yelled while I’d already started gathering back my things.

My briefcase was right beside me; papers were scattered all around.

“S-Sir,” someone tried to say when I pushed their hand away.

I needed space. I needed to be out of here. Deciding to leave my things on the ground, I got up and just ran away. It was suffocatingly hot, and sweat soaked through my clothes, but I couldn’t stop, and I kept running until my legs carried me home. I hoped that once I saw his face, I would be able to calm down, but the opposite happened, and my panic doubled. Throughout the evening, I bottled up everything inside, telling myself again and again that I must hold it together, when suddenly Ashton asked something.

“Is it that bad?”

What would he think of me once he finds out I’m nothing more than a perverted freak?

“I guess I’m just not meant to be in the kitchen,” he chuckled.

He won’t laugh anymore.

“I was thinking, maybe we can go somewhere soon?”

He won’t look at me with such kindness and affection.

“We can go someplace warm. I know how much you enjoy the sun—”

He won’t love me anymore, and I’ll lose the one thing that keeps me sane.

“I can’t do this anymore,” I cut into his words.

Everything was crumbling around me, and just like that, one bad decision after another, I finally put the last nail in my coffin.

“I said, I can’t do this anymore,” I repeated myself, well aware I was sentencing myself to my own death.

“Please don’t cry, my love,” I told Ashton while offering him my handkerchief.

“W-Why?” He took the handkerchief and cleared his nose. “Why only now?” Sniff. “Why are you only telling me about this now?”

My sweet little Sparrow was too kind for his own good. Too naive and gentle. The truth was, I’d wanted to tell him this years ago. In fact, I was ready to share my story with him as soon as I was out of the hospital, but then I came to his house and saw that he’d moved on. I couldn’t say I believed Kai, more like I chose to believe him. He was a snake then and still was now, but for many years, I had convinced myself that he was a better fit for Ashton. And on paper, he was. They merged into each other’s lives so easily that it was painful for me to watch, but it was also reality. Of course, now I held different beliefs, and I had no doubt that Ashton belonged with me. But despite knowing that, I wasn’t willing to tell him his best friend had betrayed him. It wasn’t right for me to break his heart, yet again.

“Why didn’t you say anything before?” he asked again, eyes red from crying.

Rubbing his cheek with my palm, I tried to smile at him. “Because it changes nothing.”

He pushed my hand away. “It changes everything.”

“Only if you don’t love him,” I said, watching the shock forming on his face.

“W-What?”

“This only changes things if you don’t love him, Ashton. Because if you do, and he’s the one, then nothing else should matter.”

If Ashton were to decide he wanted me back, he needed to come to that decision on his own. Manipulating him in order to keep him away from Kai wouldn’t help. Not anymore. Like I said, I’d changed in the time we’d been apart, and I had no intention of repeating the same mistakes I once did.

“Soren,” he whispered, his eyes jumping from mine to my lips. He then placed his hand on my thigh and leaned in. My heart rate lowered the closer he got until his breath brushed against my lips. But then, the door to the courtroom opened, and Ashton quickly jumped back.

“K-Kai,” he gasped, his voice choked.

“There you are. I was looking for you everywhere.” Kai smiled while walking down the aisle toward us.