Page 118 of Forgotten Prejudice

I hate it. I hated that after all this time, he still had that impact on my body. And while his touch felt good against my skin, I knew it was wrong. Not only because of our past, but because of our present. My focus must be on Diesel and the trial, and I couldn’t afford any distractions.

So, when it felt like he was about to lean in, I pulled back. Breaking our stare, I took a deep breath to calm myself from what just went on.

“I often tell the kids that they should live life to the fullest,” I began saying, thinking about all four of them. “I warn them of regrets, saying that it’s a man’s worst enemy. And yet, I’m filled with them.” A soft smile pulled on my lips. “Diesel is not going to be another regret,” I declared, turning to face Soren. “So start looking at him, too. Understand what he’s like. You already managed to help him once, so do it again. But this time, actually see who he is because he’s truly an exceptional young man.”

Soren didn’t say anything and instead kept looking at me like he never had before. What was up with that?

“What’s wrong?” I asked when he finally snapped out of that weird vibe.

“Nothing.” He grabbed the steering wheel. “I was just impressed with how mature you’ve become.”

A sense of pride overtook me as dangerous warmth filled my stomach. Knowing better than to embrace this feeling like I did in the past, I huffed. “Well, that’s what seven years does to you.” Moving my body, I reached to open the door when he spoke.

“Let me give you a ride home.”

“No need.” I glanced back at him, a half smile on my lips. “Kai’s coming to pick me up on his bike.”

Soren’s jaw clenched like he’d taken a bite from something sour, and chuckling, I got out of his car. But only after he drove off did I acknowledge how fast my heart was racing. One might think I’d just run a fucking marathon, but no. All I did was spend a few minutes in his proximity. Realizing spending time with him was becoming dangerous, I forced myself to walk faster to where Kai told me to meet him. My anxiety over the situation grew with each passing minute until breathing became difficult. But then, like a miracle, Kai called out my name, and I turned around to find him behind me. One glance at his easygoing smile was enough to put me at ease.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” he asked after I tossed myself into his arms and buried my face in the curve of his neck.

“I’m just really tired,” I muttered.

Wrapping his arms around me, he held me closer. His body was so warm, and his cologne was nice, smelling nothing like Soren’s.

Shit. Why did I just think of him again?

“Wanna grab something to eat?” Kai asked, grabbing my attention from the unpleasant feeling that gnawed in my stomach.

“Only if you’re cooking.”

“You bet, babe.” I liked it when he said that word. It was so dumb yet cute at the same time.

With his carefree personality, Kai managed to make me feel somehow better, and the night went off smoothly until later on, when we had sex and he came over my face. After he was done, he cupped my face in his palms, and I remembered when Soren did it earlier that evening. The same awful feeling once again swirled my insides, only now I realized what it was.

Guilt.

Kai

“Hey, Ashy,” I said after waving to the group of people I’d been with to keep it low. “What’s up?”

“Hey. Are you busy?”

Still unable to hear a word he was saying because of how loud these restaurants were, I got up and walked away from our table. “Sorry, I had to move somewhere quieter.” I leaned my back against the wall. I think this was the hall leading to the bathroom. “So what were you saying?”

“Oh, nothing special. I just asked if you’re busy, but it sounds like you are.” He went quiet for a second. “Are you still in the restaurant?”

“Nah. I came with a bunch of people to a new place that had just opened. It’s actually awesome. How about you join me?”

A group of girls passed me on their way to the bathroom, and a hot brunette with a killer body caught my eye. I was pretty sure she checked me out, so I smiled at her before going back to the call. “So what do you say? Feel like joining me?”

Ash snorted. “I’m beat, Kai. We had a long day in court, and I think we’re making progress with the jurors—”

“Come on, Ashy,” I groaned. “You need to live a little, too. You know?” Ash putting all of his focus on the trial was unhealthy. He was driving himself nuts, and sometimes, me as well. I understood that he cared, but he couldn’t stop living; I mean, what if Diesel did end up going to jail? What would Ash do then? Of course, God forbid I ever told him that. I’d implied it the other day, and in return, Ash nearly ripped my head off. I wasn’t trying to be mean, but he had to face reality.

“I’m really tired, Kai,” he said with a heavy breath.

“Want me to come home, then?” I asked while hoping he’d say no. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to be there for him. I did. But doing it every day was fucking hard, and sometimes, I needed a break to let loose. It had been a week since we last had sex, and my dick was about to burst with how horny I’d gotten.