Page 117 of Mistaken Prejudice

“Oh God, no. I tried. Believe me, I did. But I need my caffeine. I’m a lawyer, remember?”

He was more welcoming than ever. In fact, he looked different. He wasn’t wearing the tailored suits I got used to seeing him in. Instead, he wore a pair of blue sweats and a matching cardigan he wore over a white T-shirt.

“You took a break from work?” I found myself asking as we passed the indoor garden they had in their hallway.

“Yes, I did. I took some time off to be with Miles and Elliot. Nothing is more important than the people you love, Andrei. Trust me on that. I’ve learned that the hard way, many years ago.”

“I don’t know why, but it surprises me that someone like you says that.” I rubbed the back of my nape, scared to make eye contact after saying something so stupid.

“Someone like me?” He stopped, and now I had to look at him.

“Well, yes, you know. A big lawyer with a successful career and everything. Usually, businessmen put work on top of everything.”

That big smile appeared on his face again, and he crossed his arms over his chest.

“I also thought the same way when I was younger. I used to believe the only things important in life were achievements, status, and my bank account. I was married to a woman and had a daughter, which I love very much, but I lived that life in order to impress society. To please some made-up standards.”

“Then what happened?”

“Elliot happened,” he said softly. “And for the first time in my life, I understood the consequences of living with regrets. Nothing is worth regretting love, Andrei. No money, no job, no pride. Ultimately, a person’s happiness is measured by the people he loves.”

I looked down at my feet, remembering what Chief told me when he drove me to the airport. Regrets are man’s worst enemy.

Right now, all I felt was regret. Regret for the way I spoke to Miles, for the way we ended things. I was stuck in my own childish world and was too stubborn to stop and listen to what he had to say.

The night he came to me and I sent him away instead of hearing him out, was the night he tried to end his life. The night his heart stopped. The night he almost died.

And what if it wasn’t an almost? What if he had died, and the last thing I told him was that I wished he were dead?

My heart sank to my stomach, and I felt I was about to be sick, when Daniel’s hand grabbed my shoulder and squeezed it hard.

“Andrei, he is okay. Don’t think about what could have happened. Just be thankful that he is alive and well.”

I knew he was saying that to help me out, but at the same time, it sounded like he needed to reassure himself of the same thing.

“Andrei.” Elliot’s voice snapped us both from the bubble we were in, and we turned around together to see him walking toward us.

“Oh, Andrei,” he said again before he wrapped his arms around me and squeezed me tight. I buried my face in his shoulder as I brought my arms up to hug him in return. As I moved them over his back, I could feel that he’d lost weight, and when he pulled out of the hug and looked at me, I saw the evidence on his face.

His cheekbones were more visible than usual, his eyes tired, and his collarbones stood out from underneath the collar of his shirt.

He probably noticed the way my eyes locked on his visible bones because he quickly covered himself with the cardigan he was wearing.

“I look terrible, but it’s been a tough few weeks.” He turned around, with his hand on my shoulder, and started to lead us toward the kitchen. “I am happy you came. Miles is happy too. You will see.”

We sat at the table as their housekeeper, Laurien, served us coffee and tea. Once she was out of the room, Elliot cleared his voice.

“We wanted to talk to you before you see Miles because… Well”—he stopped as if to rethink his words—“Daniel said that he told you about Miles’s condition.”

I nodded. “Yes, he did.”

“Okay, good, good. If you have any questions at all, please don’t hesitate to ask.”

“I will. Don’t worry,” I said quickly. “I also read a lot. Online. And in books that I bought. So don’t worry. I mean, I’ll be careful from now on. I won’t do anything to risk him or—”

“You don’t need to do anything different,” Daniel said and stopped my word vomit.

“Miles wouldn’t want you to act differently around him, nor would we. The reason we wanted to talk with you before you meet him was to make sure you are okay and ready.”