Page 69 of My Killer Blind Date

I rummage to the bottom, because I have to be one hundred per cent sure there is no body or body part under here … though considering the freezer isn’t actually cold, it would smell really bad by now …

‘Margot?’

‘Ack!’ I scream, spinning with a tent pole in my hand.

Liam pokes his head in, looking worried. ‘What are you doing in here?’

‘Oh …’ I gesture to the tent poles that are now rolling around the floor. ‘Well, I was checking out the laundry facilities, and I saw your deep freezer! And at first, I was hoping you were going to surprise me with half a cow! But then I realized I could really use a lantern tonight, you know, when it gets dark, so I hope it’s OK that …’ I reach back into the freezer and grab the lantern. ‘Sorry I made a mess?’

His face breaks into a smile. ‘Yeah, the freezer hasn’t ever worked. The old owners left it here. It’s a glorified storage chest at this point. But by all means, help yourself to the lantern. Or the tent, if you’re in the mood to sleep outside.’

At this point, I drop the lantern and tent pole back into the freezer and fling my arms around Liam’s neck. He makes a gentle ‘oof’ sound, then surrounds me with his arms.

I let myself really feel the solidity of his body. Inhale his scent. Feel those arms I’m so obsessed with as they press tight around me.

‘You OK?’ he says.

‘Better than OK,’ I say into the crook of his neck.

*

The day passes in a haze of delight. We eat eggs with fresh tomato and chives for brunch, we talk about our favorite dining spots in Chicago and shoot the shit about the latest Marvel movie. Then I take a three-hour nap on the couch. I wake up refreshed. Liam sets out a charcuterie board for an early dinner, and we sit on the deck and watch the waves roll in as we snack on a Basque goat cheese, a soft French cheese, cured meat, olives and nuts. The whole time, in the back of my mind, I’m thinking could this be my life? Dating Liam, doing our weeks in the city and spending weekends out here at the cabin? It seems too good to be true that all this could be mine, and more than once, I feel my heart tightening with some emotion I can’t even name. Is this what happiness feels like?

After we’ve demolished the charcuterie, we roll up our jeans and take a long walk up the beach in the fading light of day. We give every house a tackiness score.

‘Oh, ten out of ten for trying too hard,’ I say, pointing to a house with stone columns and a turret. I point to the next one. ‘Eight. Too fussy.’ It has trim for days, a pagoda in the side yard and a scrolling iron archway leading from the yard to the beach. ‘Your cabin is obviously perfection. These rich people have no taste.’

‘Well this one’s perfect,’ says Liam, but when I look at him, he’s not looking at any houses. He’s looking at me.

We hold hands as we walk, occasionally pausing to dip our feet into the water and look out over the horizon. If George saw me now, taking a romantic walk on the beach with my boyfriend, she’d freak. I mean, I’m on the edge of freaking.

Is this what other people’s lives are like? Just … full of simple delight?

‘I barely know anything about your past,’ I say as we walk, skirting shells and a few piles of seaweed. ‘Your family. Tell me about them.’

‘Mmm. There’s actually something pretty big from my past that we’ve never talked about.’

‘Oh?’

‘My, uh …’ He runs his free hand through his hair and looks down. ‘My older sister, Janie.’ He forces himself to look at me, his gray eyes clear, but intense. ‘She went missing when I was ten.’

‘Oh, no, Liam. I’m so sorry!’

His mouth twists. ‘It’s been eighteen years, but the pain never goes away. You know?’

I firm my grip on his hand, because I know. A wave rolls up, frothing over our ankles, as we walk the line that separates sand and water.

‘There was an age gap – she was six years older. But we had an incredible relationship. She was my best friend. I’d tell her about all my ten-year-old woes and obsessions and what-have-yous. And then, one day, she went to the corner gas station because we were out of milk.’ Liam swallows. ‘She never came back.’

‘Liam,’ I breathe.

I feel like I’m seeing into his soul. I’ve never been so certain that this man is not a serial killer. In fact, all of my theories now seem ridiculous.

‘My parents never got over it. They live in a retirement community now in Portage Park. I visit them once a month, but it’s like they shut down eighteen years ago when Janie went missing. I don’t think they ever started living again.’

Shit. A shiver goes over me, because I can relate, with the way Zoe’s disappearance dominated my life. If I hadn’t met Liam … if George hadn’t kept pushing me to reboot the coffee shop dream … that could have been me. Fading away. Not really living.

‘I don’t know what to say,’ I murmur. ‘I’m so, so sorry.’