Page 14 of A Game of Scandal

“When Mother is here,” I said, regaining my poise, “she and Max will be a united front. I know she’ll be against the idea of university. She already thinks I spend too much time with my books. Max will hate the idea of being at loggerheads with her. And I … I don’t want to be a disappointment. I want to please them. But, in doing so, I slip away from myself.” I swallowed. “I don’t know how to express it clearly. I hate the whole wretched idea of a social season. It isn’t only that I don’t want to get married. I find the notion of a sort of market where I am to be put up for sale … disgusting. It seems outrageous to me that we’re expected to accept such a situation as being ordinary. And there are so many people, so many rules, so much attention – it’s crushing. Whenever I’ve tried to explain this to Max, I know how it sounds: ungrateful or contrary. But the truth is that I can’t breathe when I think about it. And I thought that if I won the money, if I could pay the fees myself, then Max would have no way of stopping me…”

As I trailed off, my voice got smaller, and I hated myself for it, the way I felt so desperate and uncertain, so out of control of my own life.

Izzy had been frowning throughout this lengthy speech, and now she looked distressed. “You know…” She sounded cautious again. “You know he only wants what is best for you.”

“Of course I do,” I huffed. “But he thinks only he knows what’s best for me.”

Izzy chuckled ruefully. “Yes, that’s Max all over. That unfortunate chivalrous streak of his.”

“He thinks of me as a child, weak.”

“No, Felicity,” Izzy jumped in. “Not weak.”

“Fragile, then. Delicate. Like a piece of the best china. Something to be brought out and shown off on special occasions, then packed carefully away. And I know why.” I cut her off before she could speak again. “I know that he has his reasons, but I’m not fragile, Izzy. I’m not, and I want to make him understand that.”

There was a beat of silence, when only the angry snap of the fire broke the quiet between us.

“Very well,” Izzy said, seeming to come to a decision. “We’ll talk to him together.”

“Really?” I perked up.

“Yes. Of course.” She reached out and pressed one of my hands between her own. “Everything you’ve said is perfectly right and true. I should have inserted myself in the matter before but I didn’t want to come between the two of you.” She exhaled. “But I’ll warn you now, it’s not going to be easy. Your brother is stubborn as a mule when it comes to protecting the people he loves. He and I have had more than one disagreement about my work.”

“Have you?” I asked, fascinated. “And how do you get round him?”

“Well,” Izzy replied, “first I remind him of several promises he made to me when he proposed. Then I tell him to stop behaving like a complete ass. That usually works.”

“And if it doesn’t?”

Her smile was feline. “I kiss him until he forgets what he was talking about in the first place. It never fails.”

I shuddered.

“You did ask.”

“I’m extremely sorry I did,” I said. “I might have known it would be something like that, the way the two of you act like lovestruck fools half the time.”

Izzy shrugged. “I love my husband very much – even when he’s being difficult.”

“Do you think he’ll change his mind about this? About me, I mean?”

Izzy didn’t have time to respond to that question, because there was a short knock at the door and then Wheeler entered. Despite the early hour, the man was immaculately turned out, posture stiff and imposing. While he didn’t seem surprised to find Izzy in boy’s clothes, his mouth twitched ever so slightly in an expression of disapproval. I was familiar with this mouth twitch, having seen it almost every day of my life. I didn’t mind it and never had, because I knew Wheeler’s darkest secret: deep, deep, deep down, the man had a heart as soft as whipped cream.

“A message from His Grace, Your Grace,” he said, holding out a silver tray with a folded note on top of it.

“Thank you, Wheeler,” Izzy said with equal formality, taking the letter from him. My sister-in-law had yet to discover Wheeler’s secret for herself, and so she was still slightly awed by him.

I grinned and shot him a wink behind her back, which he pretended to ignore.

“Well, it looks as though we won’t be finding out what your brother thinks in the immediate future,” Izzy sighed. “He’s been called away on urgent business. He doesn’t know for how long, but at least a week.” She scanned the rest of the letter and whatever she saw there had colour flushing her cheeks and a soft smile on her lips. She folded the note and carefully slipped it into her pocket. Presumably to moon over later. “Thank you, Wheeler.”

The butler gave a stiff bow and left the room.

“Well,” I said brightly, “at least that simplifies some things.”

“Does it?” Izzy said, still clearly distracted by Max’s sweet nothings.

“Yes. We’ll have no trouble spending the next few days scheming to take down this Laing fellow.”