Page 574 of Call Me Baby 2: Side B

Before his panic takes the wheel, I reach into my bag, pull out his wallet, and hold it out for him.

His eyes snap to the wallet,

then to me.

I want to comfort him, to get him to relax, but I don't know where the fuck we stand.

“This is good news, Drew,” I finally say.

He nods as he takes it

and drops it into his lap.

Eyes back on the road,

he pushes his palm up his forehead.

“Andrew—”

I want to tell him it’s going to be okay.

But one: I don’t know that.

Two: feels too empty.

“Tell me what you need, alright?”

I keep my eyes on the road.

It's taking me a lot to agree to go,

but I can't abandon him.

Not with this.

“I’m here, but if you change your mind and need me gone when we get there? I’ll go. No scene or nothing. But until then…” I shrug. “You take care of your mom. Let me take care of you.”

His eyes stay on the road, his right hand on the wheel, while he reaches across the console with the other, and takes my hand in his.

We hit the mouth of the Lincoln Tunnel fast, the yellow tiles flying by as he weaves past delivery trucks. And as soon as we spill out onto the other side, he climbs the winding Union City streets before the tires slam to a stop in front of his place a few minutes later.

He throws the gear into park,

the car still rocking before he jumps out.

“Allison, stay in the car.

“Lock the doors. Keep the heat on.

“I’m grabbin’ Ma, Momma, the bag.

“Five minutes. Don’t move.”

Then he sprints up the porch steps and disappears inside.

I sit back in the passenger seat, heat blasting my legs, not even knowing if I belong in this moment, and even more ashamed that liquor’s still slugging in my blood.

I look down at myself.