Page 73 of Beautiful Small Things

“I don’t want to be the person who haunts your what-ifs.”

His words are sincere. My heart shatters into a thousand pieces as he continues.

“What did your sister say?” He asks.

Looking down at the grass under my feet, I reply. “It doesn’t matter.”

“Please just tell me what she said,” he pleads.

My grief gives way to anger as I spit out my next words.

“She said I should go. She said the same thing you did. ‘I’m young and shouldn’t give up this opportunity.’ Is that what you want to hear?”

“I think deep down you know we are right,” he says softly.

“What about Iris?” I cry. “I don’t want to leave her.”

“James,” he says calmly, “Neither of us is going anywhere. She will be right here.”

“She will forget me!” I shudder as the words leave my body.

“That’s not possible,” Marcus responds. “We will make sure that doesn’t happen.”

My body is shaking as I pull my legs up and wrap my arms around them for comfort. Tears stream down my face as I look him in the eye and ask the question I have dreaded.

“So you think I should go?” I choke out.

He meets my eyes. I see confusion and sadness, but mostly I see love. “I think you should go,” he says.

Chapter thirty

Belly Flops

Iris

I spend my morning working on a few things for the classes I’m currently taking. It’s summer now and I know the beach will be packed today so I decide to stay home and lounge by the pool instead. I sent Orion a text and asked if he wants to come over, but the text remains unanswered.

Unbothered, I grab some light reading and lemonade and make my way to the pool. I’m enjoying the sun on my skin and the book is just getting good when I hear the back gate open.

In a panic, I grab my book and stuff it under my lounge chair just before Orion waltzes in.

“What are you doing here?” I ask, looking like a girl who almost got caught reading a smutty book.

“You invited me over. I’m here,” he says warily. “Did I do something wrong?”

I can’t see his green eyes behind his glasses, but I know his eyes are tight with concern.

“No,” I reply, shaking my head. “I just thought you weren’t coming when I didn’t hear from you.”

“Well, surprise,” he says, plopping down in the chair beside me. “What’s new?” He asks, kicking his feet out and placing his hands behind his head. He’s wearing board shorts, a tee shirt, and flip-flops, so apparently, he’s planning on staying and swimming.

“Honestly,” I tell him. “I’ve been re-examining myself and how I’m living my life.”

“That’s… interesting,” he replies. “What have you come up with?”

“I would like to let loose more. To act my age. To act recklessly, even,” I reply.

“First agreeing to go out with Henry, and now wanting to live recklessly. What have you done with my sensible cousin?” He jokes.