Page 114 of Risking the Pucking Defense

“Then maybe they never deserved to have you as a part of their team in the first place.”

“I can’t start over, Bea. I just can’t. All of this…” I say, gesturing to everything I’ve built here in LA. “It’s damn near killed me to get to this point, to shed my past and find who I really am. I can’t have that ripped away from me. I just can’t.”

“Even if it means you get Hayden?”

33

HAYDEN

Hailee’s radio silence isn’t sitting well with me. I’ve sent her more than a few messages since our exchange the other night, but none of them have been read, let alone responded to.

I keep telling myself that it’s just because she’s busy, that she’ll be on this plane to Boston for our first road exhibition game and we’ll be able to talk then.

But despite trying to convince myself that everything is okay, the dread doesn’t go away.

I get that she might have come to her senses and realized she was wasting her time with me, risking too much, but a little heads-up would have been nice.

Nerves flutter in my stomach as I climb the stairs to the plane, knowing I’m about to see her. I stop breathing as I step onto the plane and turn to walk down the aisle. The coaching staff sits at the very front, followed by the medical team and then other front office staff, including Hailee and our social media team and reporters.

I scan the seats as casually as I can as I make my way down, but when I get to where she’d usually be, I don’t find her. Instead, I find Katie, her senior manager.

My heart slams against my ribs as my legs continue to carry me to my own seat.

Why isn’t she here?

Something is wrong. It has to be.

After sliding my carry-on into the overhead compartment, I drop into my seat and pull my cell from my pocket.

I don’t have a message from her, but honestly, I wasn’t expecting one. That doesn’t stop me from sending her another, though.

The sight of my previous messages sitting there unread doesn’t make me feel any better, but I tap out another regardless.

Hayden: Are you okay?

I stare at the screen, waiting for the ticks to change color, but nothing happens.

“Fuck,” I hiss, swiping out of our conversation before anyone can see it.

The rest of the guys file onto the plane, and the second I spot Rett, I keep my eyes on him, silently demanding his attention.

“Hey, you all right, man?”

I want to ask if he knows anything. But this is not the place to get into that conversation; there are too many sets of ears.

“Yeah, I’m good. You?”

“Yeah, buzzing for this game,” he says, having little choice but to keep moving.

A pained sigh leaves me, and I rest my head against the wall as the rest of the team get themselves settled for the flight.

I should be excited. It’s our first road trip of the season. We literally have everything ahead of us, and if last year is anything to go by, it could be an incredible year. But…

Everything feels wrong.

I squeeze my eyes closed as Brody drops into the seat beside me, trying to come to terms with the fact that there isn’t anything I can do about the situation with Hailee. I can’t force her to talk to me when I’m in LA; I can do even less from the other side of the country.

The flight seems to go on forever. But I’m pretty sure I’m the only one who’d say that. While I was struggling to put a smile on my face, the rest of the guys were buzzing.