Page 30 of The Coldest: Stay Dangerous Part 2

“We’re gonna have an honest conversation, Snow.” I ignore her flinching at the sound of my voice. “We both need to clear the air.”

She averts her eyes, before glaring at me. Fear is there, rightfully, but so is fire. Snow came back to life in more ways than one after her ibogaine trip, and it has me wondering what exactly she dreamt about while she was under.

“Do you even know how to be honest, Richard?”

I narrow my good eye at her, before I lick my lips. Her and that fucking name.

“If I’m asking you to be honest, the least I could do is be honest myself.”

“That’s not answering my question,” she grits. “Look, Rico. I already know where this is going. But if I’m gonna be honest with you, you need to be honest with me. Brutally honest. Leave no stone unturned. No riddles or double entendres. Be blunt and as literal as possible. So again, are you even capable?”

I sink a little into the chair, but she’s unyielding. Her back is ramrod straight as she looks at me expectantly.

Snow doesn’t think I can do it.

“Fine. One hundred percent honesty. I’ll go first. Why did you fuck Set?”

She blinks. “Because I could.”

I sit up to speak but she cuts me off.

“Imagine my surprise when Set, one of my ex-boyfriend’s best friends, my sister’s baby daddy’s best friend, comes onto me. Someone I’ve known like, what, ten years at the time? But there’s no reason I would have told him I dated his friend. Why would I have said something, when there were countless other people who could have, on my ex’s behalf? The same man who regularly checked my phone for other niggas’ numbers.

“Set came onto me in front of Fredo. Your twin brother. And… nada. Not even a wayward glance from him. That’s when I knew everything I thought we ever shared was a lie. That I mean nothing to you.” She blinks again, and this time tears dislodge from her lids and roll down her cheeks.

The fire in her browns ignites more.

“So I fucked him because I could. And then, I kept fucking him because at least with Set, I knew what I was getting. He told me up front what it was, and never switched up.”

“Did you?” I push out. Everything in my body is rebelling, but I have to know. I need to know. My hands grip the armrests, the wood groaning beneath my fingers. “Did you switch up? Did you… you loved him?”

She keeps me in suspense for far too long.

“No,” she finally says, licking tears from her top lip. “Not in that way.”

It must be obvious, the exhale I take, because Snow scrunches up her face.

“Oh, fuck you! My turn; how many times did you cheat on me, Rico? Be honest.”

Shit.

But, a deal’s a deal. So, I turn my brain off, and just answer.

“I never stopped fucking other bitches, Snow. We… we wasn’t having sex at first, and I was never gon’ pressure you, so I got it elsewhere.”

“And when we started?” Her voice is lower, her shoulders hunching. But she wanted honesty. She deserves it, so I give it to her.

“I’on know, Snow. It’s… sex. I ain’t ever put feelings on that shit. If I had an itch, and I was out handling business, I’d pull up on a slide. It’s what I’d been doing. It ain’t mean shit to me.”

“But it meant something to me! You burned me! Do you even know who gave it to you?!”

My jaw clenches as she drags us down memory lane. We hit a door, but once again, I say fuck it and open it.

“Yeah, actually. I fucked Tiny–”

Snow shoots up to her knees. “You fucked her raw–”

“Man, hell no, Snow. You the only… you the only girl I ever fucked raw, because… you the only person I put feelings on sex with.” My eye patch feels too tight, but I don’t take it off. I just look away from her, thankful I can’t hear her heart breaking like I know it is.