Page 76 of Zero Confusion

Zach nodded, wondering if the gift of speech would ever return to him or if he’d go through the rest of his life unable to form a single sentence. He gestured inside, and Miles walked in. Wordlessly, they moved through the small space—Zach setting his bag on the kitchen counter and Miles leaning against the wall a few feet away.

They stared at each other and waited.

Zach had avoided looking at photos of Miles, going so far as to change his laptop background to a boring landscape, but it hadn’t made much difference. Miles’s face was etched into his brain—the sweet smile that could turn mischievous on a dime, the bottomless eyes that revealed his every emotion.

Now that piercing gaze was trained on Zach, betraying nothing.

Miles folded his arms in front of his chest. Even with the tension swirling around them, Zach’s attention snagged on the flex of his biceps. The hallway must have been too warm, because Miles’s flannel dangled from his wrist, his T-shirt doing little to hide the definition beneath.

“I’m...” Miles broke the silence, shifting from foot to foot. “I’m here on Max’s behalf.”

That made sense. Miles wasn’t here for him. He hadn’t traveled six hundred miles to profess his undying love, to beg Zach to come back, to fill the gaping void inside Zach’s chest with his comforting touch.

He was here for a purpose. Nothing more than running an errand. For Max.

Which…didn’t really make sense. That was quite the long-distance errand. And what would Max even need from Zach? The twenty bucks Zach owed him for a pizza from a few years back didn’t really justify an in-person visit from another state.

“How is Max?” Zach asked, for lack of originality.

“He’s doing great,” Miles said. “He’s getting married.”

The words landed like a punch in the gut, and Zach stumbled back. Max was getting married. And Raymond… What about Raymond? Zach tried not to remember the hitch in Raymond’s breath, the resignation in his eyes as he lamented about watching Max be set up with other people, but the memories rushed through him anyway, stealing the air from his lungs. This wasn’t Raymond coping with Max going on an occasional fake date. This was…

Miles closed the distance between them in three steps and placed a warm palm on Zach’s shoulder. “Zee, what’s wrong?” The concern in his voice melted something inside Zach, and he lost himself in the familiar, soothing comfort of Miles’s presence. They were so close. Zach could see the dark flecks dancing in the sky blue of Miles’s eyes, could feel the gentle nudge of his breath. Miles’s fingers slipped to the back of Zach’s neck and tightened, holding him still.

Zach wished he could sag into the touch and let Miles carry his weight.

He could. Miles would let him. Miles would hug him, would hold him like he was the most precious thing in the world—the same way he always had.

No, no, no.

Zach didn’t need to fall down that rabbit hole. As much as he wanted to be surrounded by Miles’s broad frame, tucked safe and secure in his embrace, it would only make things harder when Miles had to let go.

And he would have to let go.

He extricated himself from Miles’s grip and headed for the couch. “That’s…good, I guess. Is Max happy?”

Miles trailed after him, dropping onto the opposite end and squinting in confusion. “Umm, yes? He’s very happy.”

“I see,” Zach said, drumming his fingers on his thighs. “That’s great. Great news. I bet your mom is pumped about it.”

Miles chuckled. “She gets to plan the wedding, so she’s thrilled.”

Making small talk while acutely aware of someone else’s pain was a teensy bit more difficult than Zach had assumed.

“How’s Raymond?”

“He’s good. Pretty busy. You know how it is.” Miles shrugged.

Red-hot anger pierced through Zach, bubbling up to the surface, impossible to contain. The man’s heart was breaking, and Miles was here talking about farm chores? Yes, summers were busy, but Zach seriously doubted Raymond gave a shit about that right now.

Oblivious to his seething, Miles kept talking, “That’s actually why I’m—”

“No,” Zach stated simply, meeting Miles’s gaze with defiance. “No. Raymond is not good. What the fuck, Miles? You’re the sweetest, most caring person I know. How can you pretend this is okay? They were together for three years. They loved each other!”

His voice got louder with each word until he was almost shouting, but Miles didn’t even have the decency to look contrite. If anything, he looked…amused? As Zach opened his mouth to ask him why the fuck he was smiling, Miles lifted his hands in surrender.

“Sorry, Zee, I didn’t mean to get you upset. I’ve been in the thick of it for a while, so I didn’t think about what it would sound like to you.”