Page 14 of Love Wells Kept

“I’m trying really hard to be hopeful,” I say quietly, knowing Jackson’s current state means he probably doesn’t hear me, but scared to admit out loud that I’m terrified. Terrified he won’t live through the night, or he won’t wake up from this coma, or he’ll never be the man I know and love again.

“I’m hoping with you. And if it feels too hard, I’ll hope for you.”

“Thank you…How are the kids?”

“Odessa’s worried, but we baked sugar cookies this afternoon and that seemed to help. And Rhett was fine without you. He’s sleeping on the couch tonight, I guess, since he’s too big for me to carry up the stairs.”

“That boy can’t make it through a single TV show without passing out.” A smile quickly erupts, then fizzles away. “I always make Jackson carry him to bed….”

“He’ll be back home and carrying that boy off to bed in no time. And in the meantime, I think tomorrow night we’ll set up a bed on the living room floor and have a slumber party.”

“They’re going to love that idea.” I yawn loudly—suddenly overwhelmed with exhaustion from the weight of the day, the darkness of the ICU room, and the comfort of knowing my kids are okay with Beryl. “Is Odessa still awake? I wanted to check in on her before bed.”

“Oh, of course.” The front door squeals open and clangs shut. “She and I were just having some tea.”

After a few moments of rustling and Beryl’s muffled voice as she talks to Odessa, a smaller voice picks up the phone.

“You making Gran’s life hell?”

I can hear her smirk through the phone. “Always.”

“Don’t be too rough on her, okay? No bringing feral animals into the house.”

“What about the barn cats? Sprinkles and Tiny and Gregory are my babies.”

“They’re barn cats. The fact that they’re meant to stay in the barn is in the name.” I exhale long and hard through my nostrils. “Please don’t cause too much trouble, okay? I’ll be here with Daddy for a while, and I need you to behave. Help with your brother, clean up after yourself, and don’t give Gran too much trouble.”

“Is Daddy okay?” Her question makes my mouth feel as if it’s filled with sand.

“He’s…yeah. He’s okay.” I give it a little oomph for believability. “He’ll be all better in no time.”

“Can I talk to him? I want to ask when we can go to a horse sale.”

I can’t bring myself to tell her the truth. Not like this—over the phone and when I have more questions than answers myself.

My heart bashes my sternum, and despite how tightly closed my eyes are, a rogue tear sneaks out and I hurriedly wipe it away.

“He’s sleeping right now…but earlier I told him you wouldn’t forget about the horse this easily. It’s going to be a while before he can take you, Dess. I promise we’ll get you the horse, though, okay?”

She’s quiet for a moment. Then after a small sigh, she mumbles, “Okay. I wanted one now so I could ride it for the rest of spring break.”

“I know you did…. For now, though, you can keep riding Daddy’s horse like you have been.”

“Fine-uh.” She groans, and it echoes. Probably off the walls of the mug she’s drinking her bedtime tea out of.

Sleepy tea is another tradition Jackson and I started on nights we couldn’t sleep while his mom was sick. Everything is a tradition he and I started. He’s the primary reason for all the good I have. My entire life begins and ends with Jackson Wells.

“Get some sleep. I love you and I’ll talk to you tomorrow, okay?”

She mumbles something of a half-hearted agreement and hangs up before passing the phone back to Beryl.

Jackson’s cheek is warm and rough against my lips when I give him a goodnight kiss. I linger for a moment, breathing against him and trying my best to inhale his scent around the smell of dried blood and sterile hospital products. When I catch the smallest whiff, I breathe deeper than I have all day, capturing him in my heart, lungs, and soul.

“Remember that night a few weeks after your mom had died, and I was supposed to move back home the next day?” My lips brush across the shell of his ear as I speak in a hushed tone, hoping against hope that this is the one thing his battered brain picks up on. “I stood in your doorway that night, both heartbroken and madly in love with you. And I told you that you needed to ask me to stay. If you didn’t ask, I’d walk away…. But you did. You asked. You saved us. So now I’m asking you—no, I’m begging. Don’t leave me. Please stay.”

Kate

The next morning, my eyes itch and burn, and I glance over at where Austin’s slouched with his head tilted back and a cowboy hat covering his face. Denny’s awake between us, playing a game on his phone. He might’ve got even less sleep than I did; every time I woke up, I found him sitting there wide awake next to me. He’d give me a gentle smile and a nod to confirm everything was okay, calming my nerves so I could let the rumble of voices down the hall lull me back to sleep.