Page 63 of Run Home

Sam

The stillness of night is interrupted by the patio door sliding open behind me. Danae wordlessly takes a seat on the chair next to mine, propping her feet on the table I’m using as a footstool. We stare up at the stars for a minute before she says, “Thanks for planning this. It’s been the perfect break from the stress of moving our stuff to the house plus wedding week.”

Smiling to myself, I say, “That’s exactly what I wanted it to be. Anxious about anything in particular for the wedding?”

Danae gives me a wry look. “You’re asking if I feel anxious about anything?”

Laughing, I repeat, “I said anything in particular.”

She huffs a laugh and replies, “We’ve planned so thoroughly, I think everything is going to run smoothly. I’m nervous about what the dynamic is going to be with my parents. But there’s no way around that. So getting away for a couple days of rest and reading was the perfect way to stop myself from obsessing over it.”

There’s a smile in her voice when she adds, “Rest, reading, and watching you watch Adrian playing in the All-Star game.”

My cheeks heat, but I shrug my hands in the air. “It’s not like I can help it that he’s fun to watch. And played an amazing game.” When Danae gives me a pointed look, I add, “And looked really good while doing it.”

We laugh before returning our gaze to the sky. Danae’s voice is gentle when she asks, “How are you doing with the relationship?”

It’s an open-ended question that could have an hours-long answer. I deflect. “This week is all about you, my dear almost sister-in-law. Let’s focus on you and Griff, not me and Adrian.”

“I can focus on both,” Danae says. “Tell me how you’re doing.”

Biting the inside of my cheek, I mull over my answer. “I don’t think I’ve ever felt happier than I do when we’re together. I love every second of time I spend with Adrian. I’m being intentional to schedule lots of seconds away from him also, but I’d be lying if I said I’m not thinking about him almost every second.” Peering over to Danae, I ask, “Is that bad, you think?”

She shakes her head. “Sounds pretty normal for a new relationship.”

Looking straight ahead, I watch my feet as I tap my bare toes together.

“What in particular is making you anxious?” Danae prods.

I focus on the sound of crickets chirping, on the breeze sighing through the trees, on the faint murmur of voices inside the house. Humming slightly, I finally answer, “I’m always a little worried that Adrian is too good to be true for me. That being with me and my baggage is holding him down from something better. Someone better for him.”

Danae doesn’t immediately contradict me, although I can sense she’s ready to. She gives me more time to finish my thought.

“I like him so much,” I say, sighing deeply. “What if I hold on too tightly to him because it’s what I want even if it ultimately stifles him?”

My insecurity hangs in the air, pulsing in the darkness.

Danae reaches her hand over and squeezes mine before answering. “I’ve sat through enough therapy sessions with Jason to understand where that insecurity is coming from, Samantha. So I’m not just dismissing your fears when I tell you that you’re wrong. You’re not an anchor weighing Adrian down. I think you’re the anchor he needs centering him in his wild life. The anchor he wants. Don’t forget that he’s the one who initiated this relationship after years of friendship. And since you started dating, he’s been even happier than his typical baseline happiness and playing even better baseball than his typical baseline greatness. You’re not weighing him down, and you’re not stifling him.”

I blink away tears as I lean my head back, watching the lights of an airplane glide across the stars.

“I understand that you still need to be somewhat guarded,” Danae says. “But don’t you dare let yourself think that you don’t deserve to be with Adrian. You’re not a burden, Samantha. Never.”

Unable to speak, I reach a hand over and squeeze Danae’s twice in a silent thank you.

Even though I enjoyed the time with Danae and her closest friends on our reading retreat, I’m aching to see Adrian in person. Thankfully, I’m a few minutes away from hugging him for the first time in six days.

It’s wedding rehearsal day, and I spent all of last night and this morning with Danae and Griffin at the house making last-minute preparations and directing the workers setting up the tent and chairs. Everything was looking perfect, so I went home to my apartment to shower and get myself ready.

It’s a good thing I had plenty of time to spare because Adrian called and begged me to come over to his house to help him finalize his outfit. It’s a flimsy excuse to see me before being surrounded by my entire family. And I’m absolutely validating the excuse, no questions asked.

After entering the security code I have memorized and winding through the neighborhood streets that now feel familiar, I pull into Adrian’s driveway. I love how second nature this drive has become. How easy it is to picture driving here every day.

Slow down. Don’t get ahead of yourself.

My cautionary self-talk flies out the window when Adrian opens the front door and practically runs down the walkway to meet me at my car. He opens my car door, offers his hand to help me stand, then raises our clasped hands to twirl me around, giving a slow whistle of appreciation. I chose a strapless periwinkle-blue dress with low heels and simple silver jewelry for today’s occasion.

As I complete my full spin, Adrian tugs my hand and says, “Hold on. I might have nosy neighbors.” We jog up the walkway, and he pulls me through the front door. After closing it, he says, “Take two.”