Page 379 of Mercy Written in Blood

Haruki's expression closed.

"You built the Family into something that protected others because you could not believe anyone would build such a thing for you."

"That is enough."

"No masks."

Haruki's eyes sharpened. Renji held them.

"You walked onto the balcony after dying because command gave you a reason to ignore fear."

"I was needed."

"Yes."

"There were people downstairs."

"Yes."

"And you could not do everything alone."

"No."

"Then I was right to go."

"You were right to lead."

Haruki became still. Renji separated the distinction carefully.

"You were not right to believe leadership required your body on the floor. You could have commanded from here."

"They needed to see me."

"I needed to see you live."

The words came harder than intended. Haruki's face changed. Renji felt his own composure thinning.

"You do not get to decide that everyone else requires your death more than I require your life."

Haruki looked down at their hands.

"I did not intend to die."

"Neither did you intend to be shot at the depot."

"There were hostages."

"Yes."

"I would make the same choice."

Renji's anger rose.

"I know." The volume did not change. That made it worse. "I know you would. That is what terrifies me."

Haruki looked at him.

"Wouldn't you?"