Page 85 of Ethan

Maybe what really mattered was thatEthandidn’t think he was even remotely pathetic.

“You’re making a necessary sacrifice to elevate your game,” Hank told Bo weakly.

Bo shot him a look. “That girl that you just stared blankly at and then just straight up saidno thanks. . . she was hot, man. I might be willing to un-elevate my game just to get into her panties.”

“You’re disgusting,” Hank declared flatly. But the truth was, he’d barely noticed what the girl looked like. He was only thinking of one person these days, and Ethan wasn’t a girl.

He was pretty sure Bo had figured that whole situation out, but they were both doing Hank the favor of pretending that he didn’t know shit.

“Buthonest,” Bo said, waggling his eyebrows before tipping the rest of his beer back. “That gives me a real leg up on most of these losers.”

Hank glanced over at him. “I wanna argue with you, but . . .”

“You know I’m fucking right,” Bo declared, grinning. “You want another beer or are you gonna go off and call your . . . um . . . your friend? The littlest Barnes?”

“If he knew you were calling him the littlest Barnes, he’d kill you, slowly.”

“Good thing he doesn’t know, then,” Bo said. “So, how about it? You gonna stay?”

“Nah,” Hank said. “I’m gonna take off in a few.”

But then Hank remembered that the Bandits had played earlier tonight, and their game had finished a few hours before the Knights’, so they were already on the plane, flying home. There was no real reason to go back to the hotel room; if he wanted to text Ethan, he could do that right here, at the bar.

Maybe that would actually make himslightlyless pathetic.

“Um, yeah, actually. Grab me another?” He tipped the empty bottle towards Bo, who nodded and took it.

Hank pulled his phone out after Bo left.

Bo just told me I was a pathetic brother in arms with him. Should I re-evaluate my entire life? Y/N

ouch,Ethan texted back.does my opinion count for anything?

more than bo’s? 100%

good, cause I think you’re fucking awesome.

It wasn’teasyto get all these pieces of Ethan and not reach out and take the ones he wanted. The ones he craved.

The ones heknewEthan wanted to give him.

Some days, being noble was manageable. Hank could compartmentalize. He could remind himself that this wasn’t forever. That at some point, Inverness would call him up and he’d take someone’s slot.

Niko was still playing well, but there were other d-men. D-men that Ethan kept telling Hank that he was better than.

Hank could usually laugh Ethan’s comments off. Tell him that he shouldn’t be saying that shit, even if nobody on the team could hear him.

But tonight was not as easy as those times.

He wanted to be on that plane with Ethan. To feel like he belonged, with one of the few people who he felt had ever reallyseenhim.

why’s bo giving you shit?

Because I’m sitting here, in this bar, surrounded by other people and I’m thinking about you.

But Hank didn’t say that, because it probablywouldbe pathetic. Ethan knew how much he wished things were different. Hank had said it enough times, in enough different ways. Unfortunately saying it didn’t change anything.

When he didn’t answer Ethan right away, naturally Ethan texted again.