Page 73 of Ethan

“Please go away,” Ethan said.

Charlie just rolled his eyes, but went to leave, patting Hank on the shoulder absently before he took off.

“Finally,” Ethan said, when the door closed behind him. He was scraping the bottom of his bowl. “You wanna watch something maybe?”

Hank was almost done with his food, too. Clearly he’d been hungrier than he’d realized. And clearly, Ethan was angling for maybe a little Netflix-and-chill, which Hank wasn’t against. Not at all.

He didn’t want to leave, but he also knew if he stayed any longer, he wouldn’t want to go at all. And hehadto.

This was already hard enough as it was. Better, maybe, to not draw it out any further.

“Actually,” he said, clearing his throat. “I do have to pack and get my shit together so I can leave early tomorrow. Gotta be there by noon.”

Ethan looked disappointed; about as disappointed as Hank felt.

And it pushed him to add, “But God, I really don’t want to.”

Ethan tangled their feet together, one ankle locked around Hank’s. Like he’d keep him here, if he could. And Hank would stay,if he could. But he couldn’t.

“Alright,” Ethan said with a sigh. “I get it, though.”

Hank was going to get through this goodbye without 1) the lump making its grand re-entrance and 2) kissing Ethan the way he wanted to, which would probably mean them both stumbling back towards the “fucking sparse room” that was currently Ethan’s.

And he nearly made it too. Nodding as Ethan cleaned up. Telling Ethan he was going to kill it when the season opened. Teasing him a little when Ethan said the same thing back.

But then the moment came, Hank by the front door, slipping his shoes back on. “I . . .” He hesitated. Shoved his hands into his pockets. He didn’t want to say it. It was unfair to make him.

Of course Ethan said it instead. “I’m gonna miss you,” he said quietly and then before Hank could slide away—if he ever could have, which was doubtful, honestly—he was leaning in and kissing him again.

Long and lush and perfect. He tasted a bit like chicken and guacamole, which shouldn’t have been attractive, but under all that, he tasted like Ethan, like he had before, and that was more than hot, it was addictive.

It wasn’t even a kiss that promised more, at least not right now, but it did say goodbye. It said everything that they weren’t saying out loud.

When they finally broke apart, Ethan’s eyes were luminous in the dim light of the hallway. “Tear it up, okay?” he said.

And Hank knew exactly what else he wasn’t saying.

Tear it up, okay, and come back soon. Come back to me.

“Yep,” Hank said and then before his heart could change his feet’s mind, he was out the door, hearing its soft click behind him.

Chapter 9

October

“You sure you’re good?” Charlie asked as he parked in the arena garage, in the blocked-off part of the lot just for players and staff.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” Ethan retorted.

“It’s a big thing, your firstrealNHL game,” Charlie said, so fucking reasonable, even though he was actually rarely anything resembling reasonable. The tone fit on him so weirdly, like a mask that wasn’t the right size.

Certainly it wasn’t convincing.

“Right, and I’m good with it,” Ethan said. “Excited, even. I’m not freaking out, I swear.”

“You’ve been . . .” Charlie paused.

“Don’t,” Ethan said. “I didn’t want to talk about it after it happened and I don’t want to talk about it now.”