Page 55 of Love in Development

I pressed my lips together and sat on my hands.

Charisse began talking.It took her less than ten minutes to fully catch Lin up.She gasped for breath.If there ever were a speed-talking contest, I was sure she would win.She’d definitely beat my computer science teacher.

Lin drilled those dark eyes into me.“So you’ve been listening to the love advice of this Shakespearean acolyte?”

Charisse’s eyes sparked with anger.Yep, she was definitely a pixie.It was just the murderous look I expected from Tinker Bell when that Wendy girl ruined all her fun.Now it was her turn to cross her arms.She stayed seated next to me but twisted her body away from us.

Great.I was caught between two angry mini-bosses.And I wasn’t in the best state of mind myself.One at a time.

“I just want to remind you that most of his plays were tragedies.And Romeo and Juliet knew each other all of ten seconds before they got married and destroyed their families’ lives,” Lin said.

“I’m pretty sure IK doesn’t know anyone in my family.Unless he is some illegitimate child of Dad or Val and we are suddenly in some weird movie plot.”

“What I’m saying is, you should probably get advice from someone who actually has a boyfriend.”

“And what is your advice, oh wise one?For this simple idiot who has fallen in love with an avatar?”

“You’re not an idiot.And you know to be aware of the inherent dangers of online relationships.So I say, trust yourself.”

I flinched at that.How did she know?

“Punishing him will only punish you.You need to talk to him.Find out what happened.Meet him online.And discover for yourself if this is something that you can continue with.Try to let go of your fears without losing your sensibility.You are a smart cookie.”

That last bit made me laugh.She sounded like her mom.“A fortune cookie?”

At that, Lin smiled.The toes had stopped tapping somewhere during the lecture.I patted the varied green fairy-tale forest quilt.But Lin looked past me at Charisse and didn’t sit.

Lin was right...and so was Charisse.I needed to be brave and trust myself.I had fallen in love with him for a reason, and I was letting fear keep me from the possibility of love.Dad had messed me up bad, but I wasn’t him.I could control my reactions and decisions.I’d already managed to be friendly with Ni.I really should send him something.Maybe a grape soda.

I picked at the 3-D purple flowers blooming from the quilt as I considered my options.Charisse didn’t kick me off her bed or Lin out of the room.My friends let me think.They were great at that.Silent supporters who were always in my corner.Kind of like Mom.I bit my lip.Knowing how much IK mattered to me, and how much was on the line—just my whole heart—I needed to make a decision.

I still had aDragon’s Eye opalto give him.And I needed to know why he hadn’t shown up yesterday.Why hadn’t he been there when I had been waiting for him?Was he as dependable as I had come to expect?But the biggest question that lurked deep within me was whether he would like me.

The reality I was finally facing was that Dad had made me feel unlovable.He had done the same thing to Mom, and we had both just hidden our pain in different ways.She had lashed out in anger, and I had hidden behind clothes and a giant wall of ‘don’t talk to me.’If I wanted this, I would have to come out of my shell.

I stood and walked past Lin.Facing the screen of my fears, I took a fortifying breath and typed.

IPRESSED A HAND TOmy chest to tame my beating heart and clicked.

“Sorry.He’s sorry!”I wanted to scream.

Lin was suddenly on one side and Charisse on the other, holding me.

“Perspective.He doesn’t have any idea what you’ve been through the last day.Where’s that level head my friend Molly is known for?”Lin’s words penetrated the anger.

I took several deep breaths in through my nose and out through my mouth.It was true.My emotions were unmanageable.I was the one acting foolish.For all he knew, he’d just accidentally missed an appointment and was letting me know at his earliest convenience.Fortified, I continued reading.

“He wants to meet under the willow to chat.”

“So go.Remember, do you want this to be a love story or a tragedy?”Charisse urged.

“I can’t go now!Look at me.”

“He’s not going to see you.”Lin’s voice carried an eye roll.

“But what if he does?I was going to invite him to meet face-to-face online.”I looked at the screen as if it held answers.

“I’m going to take a shower first and calm down now that I know he’s alive.Excuse me.”I pushed past them, got out clean clothes—pretty ones—and headed for the bathroom.I turned the water as hot as I could stand and dug my fingers into my scalp, massaging away the circling thoughts.