Page 46 of Bless This Hot Mess

Carrington jumped in, “And doesn’t have to do those ridiculous radio-thons.”

Emma-Lou straightened up, took a deep breath and looked at the trio, “Rebekkah, Ronald, and Japheth, you three get your radio show,ifyou get a lawyer’s approval.”

Ronald blinked, “You’re gonna bring the law into thisnow?”

Ignoring him, Emma-Lou continued, “And you have the added motivation of building an audience and ad revenue quickly or… or…”

Rebekkah, her voice low and pensive, whispered, “We disappear. Yup, I’m still rolling that one around.”

Japheth, a slight grin creeping onto his face, muttered, “And I get a weekly date with Rino Ferrari. A meeting. We can just call it a meeting.”

Suddenly, heavy footsteps echoed back into the room. Rino appeared, a smirk on his lips, “It’s cute you all think it’s up for discussion. Just to be clear, it’s not. Le Château, let’s goCucciolo.”

“Did he just call me puppy? Like acutepuppy? In Italian? Acute, Italian puppy? Or was that, like, for all of us?” Japheth’s eyes widened, “I’m gonna go and um… find out.”

The platform heels of Japheth’s triple buckled Aldo boots click-clacked the floor as he scampered after Rino. As the door swung shut, Ronald turned to the group, his voice full of disbelief, “Did we just get a gangsta Godfather?”

Rebekkah’s eyes lit up with sudden realization, “And our radio show is a go?”

Emma-Lou, still processing, nodded slowly, “And WWJD will be saved?”

Suwarna picked up a watering can to give the desk fern a drink, “What could go wrong?”

Before anyone could reply, the voice of the radio DJ blared over the office speakers, interrupting their thoughts and forcing them to focus elsewhere, “You’re listening to WWJD in Greater Napanee. We’re just thirty-five hours and forty-seven thousand and thirty-two dollars away from hitting our crucial goal of fifty thousand to stay on the air.”

Ronald raised an eyebrow, about to make a sarcastic comment, when the DJ’s voice continued with surprising news, “Tape on your toupées listeners, my producer is holding up a sign on the studio glass. The radio-thon is… over?! It’s over! Oh, thank Jesus. An anonymous donor just filled our gap! Well hallelujah!”

Emma-Lou’s eyes widened as the DJ’s announcement sank in.

“An anonymous donor?” Rebekkah whispered, incredulity in her voice.

Carrington’s gaze narrowed knowingly, “I think we all know who that anonymous donor is.”

Ronald let out a low whistle, “Guess Rino didn’t waste any time, did he?”

Rebekkah looked between them, a sense of dread creeping into her voice, “Is that a good thing?”

Emma-Lou, her face pale but determined, stood up and exhaled deeply, “It’s not just about good or bad anymore. It’s about survival. WWJD is on the air. We’ve got our shot. Now we just have to take it.”

Rebekkah, always optimistic, smiled faintly, “And we will. We must.”

Ronald crossed his arms, his expression unreadable, “Well, hallelujah, I guess.”

The air in the room seemed to settle, but the weight of what had just transpired, and what it meant for all of them, lingered, thick as thieves. WWJD was saved for now, but at what cost?

And elsewhere, throughout the radio speakers in cars, kitchens, tractors and the hospital waiting rooms of Greater Napanee and the Land O’Lakes region, the monks continued their cadence, singing in Latin about how every sin, properly remixed, could sound a little like grace.

Chapter 6

Weinus, Weinus & Ware LLC

There’s a moment in every blossoming bromance when you realize the guy sitting next to you, sipping root beer and shooting the breeze about aliens, might just be a soulmate. And in that moment, it’s best to shut up, soak up the sun, and not question the universe.

The day was warm but not stifling, with just enough cloud cover to keep things pleasant. Japheth sat back in his lawn chair, eyes squinting against the summer sun. A cooler full of root beer rested between him and Ronald, his new bandmate, potential best friend, and maybe future co-star in some Christian remake ofTop Gun. He was currently waffling between titles likeTop Son: Highway to HeavenandTop Nunbut he didn’t feel confident audiences were ready for flying nuns, who would greenlight that?

Obviously the first could be a rocket ship for his career in the title role ofTop Sonand the other would serve Rebekkah well, though he wasn’t sure she’d be thrilled about hiding her generous hourglass figure underthe habit. That just left creating a star vehicle for Ronald. Japheth pondered and thenTop Angel: Mission Possiblesprung to mind. Ronald was heavenly and an answer to a prayer. A trilogy for Trinity!

“This is so nice,” Japheth said, breaking the silence, his voice a mix of disbelief and pure content. “Just us two guys, hanging out on my front lawn. We’ve got a cooler full of root beer, the sun’s beating down, but not oppressive, you know? Those clouds are working overtime. And we’ve got nothing to do but daydream.”