Page 30 of In the Same Boat

‘She didn’t seem like much of a laugh to me,’ I point out. ‘But I can definitely appreciate why she’s single. She’s not very friendly.’

‘Her mum says she’s been having trouble meeting the right men,’ he tells me, his tone hushed for no reason.

I can’t imagine Sammie being happy with her mum telling people that.

‘You don’t say stuff like that about me, do you?’

There’s a beat too many of silence.

‘Dad?’

‘Of course not,’ he insists. ‘I always tell everyone how popular you are with the ladies. All the girls…’

‘Wait, that doesn’t sound great either, does it?’

‘I’m just trying to be a good wingman, son,’ he tells me.

His intentions might be good but his execution is shocking.

‘Dad, we’ve been through this, I’m not looking to date anyone right now.’

‘I know, I know, you’ve got a job, you’re having some time to yourself – I’ve heard it before.’

He’s heard it before, he acknowledges that I want some time to myself, and yet he is always here – and even when he isn’t with me, he’s having me pick him up.

‘I’m just saying… she was great.’

‘Who?’ I ask.

He slaps me on the arm.

‘Chrissy – you clown.’

‘I know, I was joking,’ I tell him. ‘You’ve already said as much about ten times.’

That gets a laugh out of him, at least.

‘You’re not taking this seriously enough,’ he suggests.

‘Dad, I’m driving you home – drunk – from the house of a woman you met less than twenty-four hours ago – a woman you met at an over-fifties singles night. Do you even know her last name?’

I take my eyes from the road to glance at him for a second. I can tell by the look on his face that he doesn’t.

‘I’m treating this with the exact level of seriousness it deserves,’ I continue. ‘I’m happy for you, Dad, really, but you just met the woman.’

‘That’s a very cynical approach,’ he points out. ‘No wonder you’re single – no wonder I’m getting more female attention than you.’

He smiles again and looks back out of the window. There’s a contentment to him that I haven’t seen much lately, and it hasn’t been easy, seeing him so lonely. So while I maintain that I’m single by choice, I think I’ll let him have that one.

It’s been a few years since Mum passed away. I know how often I think of her, so it must be worse for him. Truthfully, I’m in awe because it must be so hard to get back out there and try to find love again after losing the person you thought you were going to spend the rest of your life with.

I’m keeping an eye out for him, and I don’t want him falling for the first woman who shows him a bit of attention. Yeah, Chrissy seems nice enough – her daughter aside – but she and Dad haven’t known each other for long enough to know if they’re a good fit yet. Much as I hate the thought of my dad ‘having a bit of fun’ – even thinking the words is making me consider therapy – if that is all this is, then fine. I just worry about him getting his heart broken, and not just for him, but for myself too, because I’ll be the person he wants to hang out with all the time if dating doesn’t seem like it’s for him, and as much as I want my own life back, if that’s what he wants, to hang out all the time, then I’ll do it, because he’s my dad, he’s lonely, and all of his mates still have their wives, they spend time with their families. The only person Dad has is me.

It’s sort of strange, seeing your dad being into a woman, when you’ve only ever known him be with your mum. He worshipped my mum, really, he did, to the point where I think that any woman would be so lucky to have him. Then again, I wonder if you can transfer that kind of love and devotion. It would be different if they had got divorced. The love would have ended, and a new kind of love would have started with someone else. But when you lose someone, that love doesn’t simply stop, it doesn’t go away; it waits, and it hurts. I still think of my mum all the time. I see things in the supermarket that I think she might like, or a funny dog video she would have laughed at, and all that love bubbles to the surface, but then it has nowhere to go. It waits. Waits for someone who is never coming back.

I know, I sound miserable, but cut me some slack. I lost my mum, and I’m worried about my dad.

‘Be happy for me, lad,’ he says eventually.