Page 26 of Love: Take Two

I want to groan, but that would certainly earn me a sound lecture. Instead, I press my resentment down and force a smile, hoping it comes across in my voice.

"I know,Maman. All the guides say to focus on maintaining your GPA and not to start too early or you'll burn out. Today, I have practice for the mock trial team, and then I plan to start on the outline for my Comparative Political Institutions paper."

She grunts again, this time in reluctant approval.

"D'accord, ma chou. Just remember to eat something and drink plenty of water. Papa and I are praying for you as always."

When the phone disconnects, I drop back onto my pillows, sighing noisily.

I'm in a terrible mood. My mother's ambush call with a healthy serving of parental guilt wasn't out of the ordinary—Iget those at least once a week. And I understand them holding on a little too tight. I'm their only child after several miscarriages and a difficult pregnancy. Though the pressure sometimes makes me feel like I can't breathe, I want to make them proud.

But I'm alsoNew Awanow.New Awais pissed she woke up alone after a night that shifted something so consequential inside her. Something that validated my lifelong obsession with true love and romance, even when the world around me refused to acknowledge the heart beating so ardently inside my chest. My time is limited, as my mother was so kind to remind me, and yet I'm taking completely unnecessary courses just for the chance to work in an industry I've been enamored with since I first stayed up to watch "Poetic Justice".

I take a deep breath to calm myself.Maybe he left me a message?I turn the phone over in my hand, but other than three missed calls from home, there's nothing. I look at the nightstand; there's no note. I want to believe Noah wouldn't do this. That maybe this is all some terrible misunderstanding; a miscommunication that I'll surely clear up with a quick text.

Noah

Hey, I missed you this morning. Whathappened?

I immediately wish I could unsend the text.I miss him?God, could I sound any more clingy? I get up and make the bed, trying not to obsess over the blunder.

After a few minutes, my phone finally dings.

Noah

Noah:Sorry. Went back to my dorm to change and wound up heading to the gym.

I let out a breath in relief. I should've known he didn't ditch me. He could've texted, but I've heard plenty of guys have terrible phone etiquette.

Noah

No worries. You wanna meet for brunch?

Or I could pick up some croissants and meet at your place, since we never got to eat dinner last night.

After a moment's hesitation, I add a winky face emoji. It's my first emoji beyond a smiley face, and a thrill runs up my spine.I'm flirting!

Noah's response is immediate.

Noah

Noah:Can't. Meeting with myTA.

When five minutes go by without another text, I get a niggling feeling. I know all about being busy—between classes and clubs, I barely sleep some nights—but something seems off. His texts are clipped, missing their usual charm.Did I do something wrong?

Rather than obsess about it, I shower and start my day. I wasn't lying to my mother; I am busy. Hopefully by tomorrow, or maybe even later tonight, everything will be back to normal.

December 2005

"Awa?!"

Sybil does a double-take as she leaves the pickup counter, a Funfetti Cake Shake in one hand and her half-open satchel in the other. I clear my laptop bag off the neighboring seat when she makes a beeline for me.

Ground Zero feels more crowded than usual tonight. Every couch is occupied, and someone tried to steal my seat when I went to the bathroom, even with my laptop on the table and my jacket on the back of the chair. I guess finals has everyone a little crazy.

This is hardly my usual study spot—I've only been here a handful of times—but I couldn't stay in my room. Not now that it feels like the site of the biggest embarrassment of mylife.So far, my brain supplies unhelpfully, and I snort into my lukewarm coffee.

"What are you doing here, girl?" Sybil asks, jostling me when she drops onto the couch beside me.