Page 77 of Consuming Logan

“I can’t believe you just said that to me. It’s about to be my freaking wedding day. Does that mean anything to you?”

Logan cut her off. “Did you know?”

Ava’s heart began to pound. Those three words were loaded with pain, anger, and betrayal.

“What are you asking?” She knew, but the choice to withhold the information until he and Robert Lee could talk was a mistake. This discussion needed to occur, but not two days before their vows.

“Did you know that the O’Connors, that my father,” he stammered, “that we are related?”

The last phrase seemed to cut him open. Ava’s heart broke seeing Logan’s despair. Slowly, she began to walk towards Logan. Anguish, not just anger, filled his eyes.

“Not until Ethan called for your blood transfusion. That’s when your aunt and brothers volunteered.” She reached out a hand, touching his forearm.

Logan yanked away from her. Her heart skipped a beat. Him rejecting her offer of comfort hurt.

“Darwin is my brother. My own mom lied to me. I trusted her. She set me up to play the fool. Brooke lied to me. I trusted her. She cheated on me with my best friend. She withheld knowledge of her pregnancy. My whole life women have manipulated, lied and hid the truth from me.”

“Logan, please. I know your upset.”

“You sound so much like her,” he muttered shaking his head.

“Who?” she rasped, not sure how to reassure him when she didn’t fully understand the head space he’d entered.

“Brooke. We argued the day of her accident. She said I was blind by my own ambition. I was trying to love and protect her,” he bellowed. “I couldn’t. Know why? She wouldn’t let me.”

Logan’s features contorted in pain, the anguish he felt visible.

“Logan, let her go,” Ava whispered, her heart splintering farther, “Forgive yourself.” This was the problem. Logan battled the demons of the past and felt the blows too. They couldn’t keep falling into this deepening hole. Eventually, solid ground would be out of their reach.

“I have,” he grumbled, anguish in his voice.

She shook her head. No matter how she tried, she just couldn’t reach this part of him. The hurt from the past directed his future. “You did what you could to save Brooke and the baby. Tyson did what he could to save you.”

“No,” he insisted. “This is different.”

“This is scary territory, but the truth is we’re all family. It’s been a horrible few months. Let’s try to be happy that we survived all this madness. I know you’re shocked,” she hesitated, “but what does it really matter? You have two brothers who love you.”

“Everything has changed. I always knew my place in the world, in the family. Now, everything I thought I was, has been chewed up and consumed by them, my hand, my parent’s divorce. Everything I trusted has been torn apart, swallowed. Where do I fit among the scraps?”

“Babe,” Ava grabbed his face with her hands, caressing his cheek, “you belong with me. I know it seems overwhelming—my deployment, your hand, the promotion, the wedding plans, the pregnancy. It’s a lot. We can get help if you’re having trouble coping with this.”

“You think I need a shrink?” He gazed at her as if she were a stranger. “That I’m too weak to deal with my own shit,” he boomed.

That wasn’t it at all. She wanted to help him. At the moment, she really wanted to smack him.

“It’s just… this is hard and scary, I’m saying that I understand if you need help,” she retorted.

“As long as I have a choice between talking about my feelings and a drink, I’ll take the drink every damn time.”

She realized this was a touchy subject. So did he. Logan didn’t take kindly to anyone questioning his ability to command his own destiny. But, that didn’t negate that Ava had to state her truth. “I need your help. With the wedding, with this house, and the pregnancy…” she trailed off.

“Tyson is my freaking older brother. He’s been bailing me out. I didn’t build this,” he spat, pointing to his chest. “He did. Do you get that?”

“Logan be reasonable. Tyson didn’t attend medical school. He didn’t spend hundreds of hours as an intern or resident. He’s certainly not an internationally recognized surgeon and wound specialist. Please, just stop obsessing over this. You have two brothers who care about you,” she plead.

“Tyson will be the head of this family. It’s his responsibility to direct our legacy. Not mine. I don’t have to do shit.”

What was this, a highlander clan in need of a chieftain?