Page 141 of Family Bonds- Gabriela & Luca

To break down without the worry of those who loved him. To not feel the concern that would be in their eyes.

He was entitled to that night. To a few days.

He’d talk to Gabriela again. Probably today at some point. She’d call like she always did.

“I want to argue with you about that, but I can’t. I don’t know her well enough.”

“Then trust me. I’ll be fine. I need a few days. I’m more concerned about Taylor and how she’s going to handle this all.”

“You always do what is right for your patients and I’m positive you will this time.”

“I will. I need to go. I just wanted to let you know.”

There was silence again, like his mother didn’t want to hang up. “I’ll check in with you later. Is that okay?”

“It’s fine,” he said and hung up a moment later.

What he needed to do was to continue with his routine. He went to his room to change into workout gear and go to the gym.

But when he opened up his drawer to get a T-shirt, it caught on the picture he’d tucked in there of him and Zoe.

To torture himself, he pulled it out and stared at his late wife. Her smile. A time when they had such a bright future ahead of them.

They were planning their family, never imagining that it wouldn’t come true.

Or that she’d be gone from his life.

He threw the picture against the wall, the glass shattering on the floor.

Just a stupid reaction. Not even called for.

Now he’d have to clean it up.

He breathed in, then again. Let out a swish of air, then sat on his bed.

His phone was in his pocket; he pulled it out, and scrolled through pictures from years ago.

Pictures of him and Zoe.

Ones he hadn’t looked at in years.

To get to them though, he had to go through all the ones he’d taken of Gabriela.

The silly ones. The serious ones. The ones where she said she loved him.

No, the hope wasn’t gone.

It couldn’t be. He refused to let it.

He found one of his favorite pictures of Zoe on their honeymoon. Years of pictures in his hand.

Years of memories.

They didn’t hurt though.

Not looking at them like he’d thought they might.

“We never planned it this way,” he whispered, the tears falling off his cheeks.