Page 73 of The Replay

I mask everything once the show ends. I grin and toast Ames with my friends, and we praise her for a long while, until she's glowing just like she did on her show.

When we move inside for dinner, I end up next to Mariana again.

Fun. Exactly what I needed. More chances to experience the contrast between what I could have had, what I lost, and the little I have today. Enough of those, and I may question if I have a right to be proud of myself at all.

"Sorry. Logistics," Ames explains.

"All good," I say, and help Mariana onto her seat.

Mariana thanks me. Glasses are filled. Everyone gets comfortable.

Saint smiles at us from across the table. "If it's a problem, the solution is easy. You two have to pair up."

"It's not a problem at all." Mariana keeps her tone light. "But we're not going to date. Our relationship was a long time ago."

At least now we're on the same page, and we're telling my friends exactly what to expect. We can be a united front. A faint ghost of what was between us, finally leading in the right direction.

I'm glad until I see the winning smile on my friend's face.

"I didn't say 'date each other’," Saint says. "Why would you think that's what I meant?"

Fuck. That's also where my mind went.

I narrow my eyes at him. "Don't start."

"You're on a break, I know." He lifts a hand in a quick apology. "Sorry. I'll stop now."

"Mariana," Ames says. "You mentioned wanting to date a lot. How's that going?”

"Not good," she replies. "I've been too busy with work to figure it out. New city, big goals, and I'm not going to lie, maybe a touch of culture shock. Work demands more of me than I expected. If I'm having fun, it's thanks to you all, not to the dating scene."

"I never found dating to be fun," Pen says. "So I don't blame you for not prioritizing it. But I think the key to romance is who you pick."

Bear responds right away. "Who you pick? Sometimes you have no choice."

"Falling in love isn't accidental." Pen frowns. "Or just chance."

"But you also can't simply point a finger at someone and decide you'll fall in love," Leon argues.

"It's not a thing you control, in any case," Damián says. "Did any of us decide to fall in love? I doubt it."

Nat shrugs. "Maybe the decision is in giving it a chance."

My eyes get stuck on the way she and Damián hold hands. I check the table. Every couple touches each other in some way. All of them, except Mariana and I.

I drink from my wine, and thank the powers that be that the first round of food is leaving the kitchen. The conversation continues as servers set food in front of us. It doesn't stop my friends. To them, this is idle conversation. At the core, it's wanting to know how we feel about things. I know they want us to be happy, too. But they can be pushy, and I don't want to deal with the things it could force me to confront.

"I fell for Evie before I knew what was happening." Logan frowns. "My reason had little to do with it, but there's not a day I'm not thankful that it happened."

Evie gives him a small kiss. "You're more romantic than anyone could guess."

"But that's not why you gave me a chance or why you love me."

Evie laughs. "Not why I love you, but I love you, and I'm pretty happy that it happened, too."

"Why did you give him a chance, then?" Mariana asks.

I give her a sideways glance. Her question surprises me.