Page 63 of Yours, For Good

She took another step back. In a room full of pinks and yellows and florals, a dark cloud shadowed everything.

Her eyes dimmed. "Are you still in love with your ex?"

I flinched. "What ex?"

"Well, that takes care of that."

"Nora, there's no one in my past. I couldn't care less about other people right now. What they might think or feel… it can't matter as much as what happens whenever we're together. When you and I are in the same room I… when we're breathing the same air, it's like I forget that I…"

My throat strangled the words I should have said.

"That you… what?" She didn't move. She watched me carefully.

The program may have been over, but she still depended on me and my money. The finish line was in sight but not within reach yet; not until she heard if she'd gotten enough investment proposals to go on independently.

I still couldn't risk what she might do, or what an incubator mentor might hear.

I fisted my hands, listless at my side. "Friendship is all I can offer. I could… I would be happy to have you as a friend, but that might end one day."

She frowned. "I don't want to lose your friendship."

"You might change your mind."

"I'm so confused… why would I change my mind?"

"I cannot say." I clenched my teeth.

"So you're telling me that the fact that I went against every sensible fiber in me and I kissed you— that you don't think it's a big deal—"

"It is a big deal!"

"— but that we shouldn't kiss, not because it could ruin the friendship we're building… but because there's something you can't disclose that could make me change my mind about you?"

I dug my nails into my palms. "Yes."

An unbelieving scoff escaped her throat. "What the fuck am I supposed to do with that?"

"Whatever you need to do, Nora."

"And what you need doesn't matter?"

"Not as much in this. Trust me."

"Trust you? Javier, I…" She let out a frustrated half-groan. "How can I do that when I know you're hiding something?"

"Trust everything else. Every word I've ever said has been the truth. The person you know is real. I'm right here in every way I can."

"And you won't kiss me… but you'll be my friend."

I nodded. "We made a pact, and I didn't take it lightly."

She crossed her arms and paced in a tiny circle; a small orbit as she thought it through. I remained immobile, waiting for her sentence.

She faced me again, a deep wrinkle in her brow. "I don't know. I need time."

I barely got to give her a nod before she made for the door. I meant to follow her, but she gestured with her hand to stop me.

She wanted to go alone.