Page 28 of Yours, Finally

Warmth infused my face and I looked away, too. He finished the last sip of his drink in one big gulp, and we waited in silence for Lina and Gabe to return.

Chapter 10

Jake

Alone in my office,I worked on a report due a few days later. Stray thoughts distracted me often; I found it hard to believe I had sung in front of people the week before. So much so, I shook my head every time I thought of it. Until I could tell my therapist I sang my own music for an audience, I would desensitize to the fear of it, taking one step closer each time. If Vanessa asked me one session how I'd managed on my first try at the karaoke, I'd have to admit I'd been close to dissociating. Then she would ask me how I'd avoided disengaging from reality, and I would have to tell her I'd used the techniques we'd practiced, including focusing on a part of my body that felt good.

Every part of me that felt good had had to do with how close Vi and I were that night. The little touches from just moving nextto each other. The warmth of her skin. The sound of her voice. One thing had led to another, and I could laugh at myself at how much I wanted to impress Vi with my singing. I could ignore everyone else, if I focused on Vi and how she might enjoy my voice.

From the look she gave me when we were alone, I had more than succeeded; she might have been in awe. She might have been on the brink of wanting me. Again? Maybe. In any case, too risky.

And, from the look Gabe and Lina had given me when she'd been on stage, I had been looking at her the same way. Only that she didn't know, and I could pretend Gabe and Lina had seen nothing.

I frowned at my computer screen, the words on it invisible to my eyes. There was a chance that Gabe suspected my feelings. Twice over the years, he'd said he wanted to talk about Vi. Each time, I'd panicked and refused. Being the good person he was, he hadn't insisted.

Still, I didn't know what Gabe thought or not about the situation, and the uncertainty sat in my stomach like lead. The idea of talking to him was worse. Vi was the one topic that I couldn't go to Gabe with.

Fuck, but I worried about what they might say. How their reaction could ruin things before they even started.

"Jake?"

Like I had summoned her, Vi entered my office and the view stopped my heart mid-beat.

"Fuck me," I groaned.

She must have heard me, because she blushed. It only made her lovelier, with her hair in a high ponytail, the ghost of a faltering smile, and wearing one of my favorite dresses of hers. It hugged her body and highlighted the curves that reminded me of my favorite guitar. Worse, it was cut in such a way thather shoulders were covered by a transparent, teasing fabric that joined at her neck in a lazily tied knot. Underneath, the part cut from a thicker, wool-like fabric had a sweetheart neckline, and buttons that I could easily imagine myself undoing. Just like I could imagine myself untying the knot at her neck, and opening her dress like she was a gift. Giving way to her in her underwear, and letting me get to her body and all the things I'd do to her while she was bent over my desk.

"Shit," I muttered again.

"Excuse me?"

"You're not shocked by some swearing, are you?" I arched an eyebrow.

"Of course not but—"

"— same ones you said in the car when your audiobook played, if I remember correctly."

I kept the curve of my brow as I gazed at her, but I added a smirk. At first, she pursed her lips. Then she laughed.

The sound slammed onto my torso, like deep bass making walls shudder. I didn't often get her smiles, her lightheartedness, her generosity. Those were for everyone else; the people who didn't turn into molten lava at the sight of her.

It was a good thing. Keeping those away from me helped. Yet it dug into me— an icepick to the chest if I thought too long about it.

"Okay, that put me in my place." She grinned. It lit up my office.

All the half-dormant feelings I'd tried to put in a box rattled and let me know they'd never been truly packed away.

"I'm sorry," I said. "I was trying to focus on this report. I didn't expect you."

It wasn't a lie; technically, I had been trying to focus on my report. Epically failing at it, too. Then she came in and made it downright impossible.

She stood in front of my desk and put her briefcase on one of the chairs. "I'm coming back from a meeting and I thought I would check in about the other two venues I found. Should I reach out to you again later?"

"Of course not. I think I still have the links you sent me open."

She rounded the desk to stare at the screen over my shoulder. I pulled up the website for one of the two venues she had found.

"See?" she said close to me. "I like the inside, but I'm not sure about the front or back gardens."