Page 5 of Certified To Handle You 2

The second we pulled off, the car got quiet, and that silence hit different ‘cause it wasn’t just quiet. It felt heavy.

Couture’s hand came down on my thigh, and I flinched before I could even stop myself. That small movement felt loud as hell to me, even though he ain’t say nothin’ about it right away.

“You good, baby? You need anything?” he asked, his voice calm, but I could feel him watchin’ me closer now, like he was tryna read me without pushin’ too hard.

“Yeah,” I replied, noddin’ again, keepin’ my eyes forward ‘cause I ain’t trust myself to hold his gaze too long. “I’m good. I’m forreal.”

He let it go, and that made it worse. It made it worse ‘cause he ain’t question me, ain’t press me or make me feel like I had to explain shit. It just reminded me of the kind of man he was. Couture was good to me in ways I couldn’t even deny, and I had just did him so dirty in a way he ain’t even see comin’.

The whole ride back, I stayed quiet, but my mind wouldn’t shut up for shit. It kept takin’ me right back to Renza, and to the way he looked at me like he wasn’t hearin’ nothin’ I said. It was the way he handled me like I was still his, and I ain’t have no say once he decided what he wanted.

I could still feel that shit on me, and it made my stomach twist ‘cause it ain’t even feel like it was over. It felt fresh, like it was still happenin’ right now, sittin’ on my skin, in my body, and in the way I shifted in my seat. I was tryna get comfortable and couldn’t. And that was the part that fucked me up the most, ‘cause I wasn’t just sittin’ here feelin’ guilty. I was rememberin’ it.

By the time we made it to the hotel, I felt like I was suffocatin’ in my own thoughts.

Couture got out and came around to my side, openin’ the door and pullin’ me into him like nothin’ was wrong.

I hugged him back, but my eyes stayed alert with my body tense as hell ‘cause all I could think about was these marks on my neck and what would happen if he saw them.

If I could just make it to the room and cover this shit up, I would be straight.

That’s all I needed… just a lil’ more time.

Couture leaned in and kissed me on the lips, and I swallowed hard against that shit, tryin’ not to react weird or pull away too fast. His hand stayed on my waist like it always did, as if nothin’ was off, and that made it even harder to stand here and pretend like I was straight.

“You sure you good? You don’t look good, and you know I’m here,” he said, lookin’ down at me.

I nodded quick. “Yeah… I’m good, baby. I promise,” I replied, keepin’ my voice as normal as I could. “I just need to take a shower or somethin’. I feel nasty after all that tusslin’ I did, and we just got off the plane too.”

Couture ain’t question it. He just nodded and walked with me inside, his hand restin’ against my lower back like always, and that small touch had my stomach twistin’ ‘cause I knew what I had just did.

The second we got in the room, Couture walked straight to the bathroom and turned the shower on for me.

I stood here for a second, watchin’ him move around like this was normal, not knowin’ that I had just betrayed him in the worst way possible.

My hands went straight to my suitcase while my mind kept runnin’, grabbin’ my makeup bag and my hair stuff ‘cause all I could think about was coverin’ my neck before Couture got too close again.

He finally came out the bathroom and walked straight up on me. His hand came to my waist, and he pulled me into him before I could even think about steppin’ back. He leaned down and kissed me again. He kissed me like I was his and like he ain’t have a reason to think otherwise.

I kissed him back ‘cause I had to, but my stomach felt tight as hell the whole time, my mind runnin’ in circles thinkin’ about what would happen if his hand slid up just a lil’ higher or if he pushed my hair back and saw my neck.

“I’m good,” I said again, more for myself than him, keepin’ my voice calm even though everything in me was not.

Couture’s hand stayed on me. He rubbed slow over my side like he was tryna settle me down, and that shit only made it worse. He was too comfortable with me. He was too sure about me, and I was standin’ here prayin’ to God he ain’t look too close or touch too much, and find some shit I couldn’t explain.

He nodded and stepped back, givin’ me space to go into the bathroom, and the second the door closed behind me, I felt like I could finally breathe.

“Fuck,” I moaned low.

The water was already runnin’ with steam startin’ to fill the room, and I stepped out my clothes slow, my body feelin’ heavier now that everything was catchin’ up to me.

The second I stepped under the water, I closed my eyes, but that ain’t help shit ‘cause all it did was take me right back to Renza.

I couldn’t stop thinkin’ about the way his hands felt on me. The way he gripped, not lettin’ me go no matter how much I pushed or hit him. The way he looked at me like he was hurt and angry at the same time, like I had did somethin’ to him just by standin’ there with somebody else.

I thought about how many times I slapped him, how my hands kept comin’ across his face, and how he ain’t flinch or back down not one time. If anything, that shit turned him on more, and that part alone made my stomach twist ‘cause I ain’t even understand that.

I slid my hands over my body under the water, tryna wash everything off, but it ain’t feel like it was goin’ nowhere. It felt like this nigga was still here, still sittin’ on my skin, still between my legs and all in my fuckin’ head. And that shit made me mad.