Page 102 of Certified To Handle You 2

“Yes,” I replied, even though the answer scared me.

He watched me for another second before finally noddin’. “Yeah, I have.”

The truth stung worse than I thought it would.

I swallowed hard and looked away from him before my face gave me away again. The old me would’ve demanded a name, asked where they met and probably started accusin’ him of talkin’ to her while we was still together. I would’ve turned one answer into a whole damn investigation until both of us was yellin’. This time, I only nodded.

“Okay,” I said low.

Renza watched me from the side. “You kept askin’. I wasn’t finna lie to you.”

“I know.”

“That’s why I ain’t wanna answer the shit,” he told me. “You wanted the truth, but now you sittin’ here hurt.”

“I said okay, Renza.”

“And I know you,” he replied. “You sayin’ okay don’t mean you okay.”

I looked down at my hands and pressed my lips together because I didn’t trust myself to say anything else. Whoever she was, she had got the version of Renza I still wanted. That was the part that hurt more than the thought of them sleepin’ together.

For the next few minutes, neither one of us spoke.

We sat side by side in the bed with the truth between us, and I tried to accept that the man beside me wasn’t mine anymore.He still cared, and I could feel that, but care wasn’t the same thing as love the way he used to give it to me.

Eventually, Renza leaned toward me and kissed the side of my face. His lips stayed there for a second before he pulled back.

“I gotta go handle some shit,” he told me. “I’mma hit you later today.”

I looked into his eyes, tryin’ to figure out if he meant it or if he was only sayin’ it because I had been cryin’. “You sure?”

“If I say I’m gon’ hit you, that’s what I’m gon’ do,” Renza replied.

I wanted to believe him, so I nodded.

He climbed out the bed again and started gettin’ dressed while I sat here watchin’ him. My emotions was still all over the place, but I held them in because I ain’t want the last thing he remembered about this mornin’ to be me fallin’ apart.

Once Renza had his shirt and shoes on, he picked up his phone and keys before turnin’ toward me.

“You gon’ at least walk me to the door?” he asked.

“Yeah,” I answered.

I got out the bed and grabbed my silk robe from the chair. After slidin’ my arms through it, I tied it around my waist and followed him through the condo.

Neither one of us said much on the way to the front door. Renza reached for the handle, opened it and then turned back toward me before steppin’ outside. For a second, we only looked at each other. Then he wrapped both arms around me and pulled me against his chest.

The hug surprised me because it felt closer to the ones he used to give me. His arms held me firm, and his face rested near the side of my head while I wrapped mine around his waist. There wasn’t nothin’ cold about it, and for these few seconds, I let myself believe there was still something between us worth savin’.

Renza pulled back and looked down at me before rubbing his hand over my arm.

“I’mma call you,” he said.

“Okay,” I replied.

He stepped through the doorway, and I stood here watchin’ him walk away until he disappeared from view.

When I finally closed the door, I rested my back against it and shut my eyes.