Page 215 of The Storm

Once we’re inside my apartment, I slam the door shut behind us, and then we stand in the hallway, both breathing heavily. Blue’s shirt sticks to his skin, and his hair is plastered to his face in wet strands.

I step closer. “Okay?” I ask hoarsely.

He nods. By now, he’s starting to shiver.

There’s so much we need to talk about, but all of it can wait just a bit.

“Shower,” I say. Goosebumps appear on my skin, painful this time because of the cold. “Now.”

He rolls his eyes, but the gesture loses some of the belligerent effect because his teeth have started to chatter.

“And then we’ll talk,” I say, stepping even closer.

“We will?”

I nod, take his hand, and pull him toward the bathroom. Once there, I turn the water on, then I turn to face him. Blue is standing in the middle of the bathroom, arms wrapped around himself.

“Clothes off,” I say as steam starts to fill the room.

“Bossy,” he says hoarsely. But then he looks away, still hugging himself. “Nicholas,” he says, soft and uncertain. He swallows, Adam’s apple moving, before his gaze stops on me again. “I don’t think…” He swallows again. “I don’t think I can do this anymore.”

I take a step forward, instinctively trying to erase the distance between us, and he takes a quick step back.

“Blue…” My heart’s beating too fast and too loud again.

He shakes his head. “Not like this.” He closes his eyes like looking at me is too much. “Just…”

I move closer. He moves back. Until his back hits the wall and he has nowhere else to go, and then I’m pressed up against him.

His eyes are still closed, and he’s still shaking his head. “I’m in love with you,” he says. I don’t know if those words have ever been delivered with such a level of doom. “Still,” he adds. “I always have been.” He sucks in a deep breath mixed with a sob. “I just… I can’t go on like we have. It hurts too much.”

My forehead is pressed against his, my hands cradling his face. “Blue,” I say hoarsely, relief battling with desperation once the words register fully. “You love me?”

He lets out a shuddering exhale. “I never stopped,” he whispers.

I brush my thumbs over the corners of his eyes, wiping away the tears that are flowing freely now.

“Blue,” I say helplessly. “Blue, I’ve been so incredibly stupid.” I take a deep breath. “I love you. More than anything, I love you. It’s always been you, and I’ve been so stubborn and stupid, but I promise, if you’ll have me, we’re going to fix us. We’re going to fix everything.”

He’s so still that I don’t think he’s even breathing. Neither am I. I’m just waiting.

And then he’s clutching me in a hug so tight it feels like he never wants to let me go, and that’s absolutely fine by me.

I wipe his tears away over and over until he’s laughing, tears still flowing.

“I love you.” I say it again and again, lips pressed against his neck and his cheek, his temples, eyes, nose, lips. I’m going to brand those words into his skin.I love you, I love you, I love you.

I’m sorry.

I love you.

I’m sorry.

“Stop apologizing,” Blue says hoarsely. “Just kiss me.”

So I do.

It’s later.Much later. A long, scorching hot shower later, when the storm clouds have parted and we’re lying under the covers in my bed, bodies plastered together, Blue’s head on my shoulder, our legs entwined, my fingers linked with his.